Superlative Sunday :: the 2012 Oscars and how I felt about them

I… am still on the fence about this last year in movies, honestly.  That 2011 was the year I started hyperactively blogging everything I saw (and thus seeing a lot) has helped me realize that 2011 was not a year where I actually cared about a lot of movies.  (I suppose extending that into things I’ve seen so far this year, as that’s the Oscar Year.)  I mean, the only three movies I bought were comic-based/book-based/hyperstylized action drama fantasy insanities (Sucker Punch, X-Men: First Class, and Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 2) and the only other one I gave a damn about was Hugo (I really should buy that, too).  If we’re counting this year, too, The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo.  Lots of feelings.  I’m looking at my post from last year’s Oscars, and not a single movie that I discussed gave me ambivalent feelings.  Feelings of “it’s good, but not great” or “I knew it was good, I just… didn’t care.”  That was the overwhelming consensus this year, I’m afraid.

The Artist (Best Picture, Actor in a Leading Role [Jean Dujardin], Directing, Costume Design, Music [Original Score])
I just.  I might be unsophisticated and lame, but while I recognized this as a good movie, yes, and Dujardin’s performance was good, and the costumes were good (I do like that era), and the music was good (it had to be, to carry a film), it just… didn’t stay with me.  I think I expect too much from movies.  I expect them to make my heart hurt (whether from sad or from extreme happy).  I expect them to, I don’t know, make me feel something.  Something.  Other than “oh, well, okay.”

Beginners (Actor in a Supporting Role [Christopher Plummer])
I have mentioned my feelings about this movie briefly, yes.  I have acknowledged how I approve of Christopher Plummer’s winning ALL the awards for his performance.  I will take this moment to say that: this movie actually made me feel something.  I gave a damn about the characters (all of them) and I loved that, while happy and sometimes whimsical, in a milder Amelie kind of way, it wasn’t perfect.  The ending wasn’t a happy ending.  I have nowhere else to say that, and realize that I never did, but since a lot of the reason that things otherwise nominated (The Descendants, for example) seem to be, at least in part, because they have that “real life story with an imperfect but not terrible ending” — this had that.  And I liked them, all of them, a lot more. 

The Descendants (Writing [Adapted Screenplay])
I saw another blogger, Deadline‘s much more important Nikki Finke, saying this: “while I’m at it, the Academy has its head up its ass for not nominating the final Harry Potter movie.”  I get behind this as a fangirl, because I have been one since I was eleven and they were eleven, it’s just a part of who I am, but I also get behind this in a more technical way.  I had many issues with the adaptations of the Harry Potter books into movies back in the day, when I was younger and I’d read the books more recently.  But not because they were bad movies.  Because I was nitpicky and I wanted more of my favorite details.  I’ve been on a rewatch spree lately, though, and I can honestly say that it doesn’t matter to me anymore.  Are there things I still want (Tonks [Natalie Tena] and Lupin [David Thewlis])?  Are there things I still think were a waste of time (the copious gratuitous nature shots in Prisoner of Azkaban)?  Yes.  Are they still very solid, very good movies that stay true to the spirit of things?  Yes.  And was the adaptation of Deathly Hallows perfect and wonderful, even with details missing because they’d been missing before and continuity and time?  Yes.

Oh, and I guess that The Descendants was a passable choice, even if I would have given this one to something else (Hugo, probably, just because I wanted it to win everything).  I haven’t read the book, and never will, but it didn’t suck.  It was good, I suppose.  So.

The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo (Film Editing)
I don’t really know how to judge this category, but since I really did like this movie a lot, I’m good with this.  They didn’t even have a score nod (I guess since The Social Network got one and won it last year, it would have been too much) but I would have wanted that, too.  (Note to self: buy this album now.)  And I knew Rooney Mara wouldn’t win.  I didn’t expect her to.  I’m just happy she got nominated.  But I still got to stare at her a few times, so I won’t complain.  Nope.

The Help (Actress in a Supporting Role [Octavia Spencer])
Okay.  Sure.

Hugo (Art Direction, Cinematography, Sound Editing, Sound Mixing, Visual Effects)
As has already been made abundantly clear: this was my Best Picture choice.  Out of immense affection for it, out of a feeling that it was a completely solid film.  It actually made me feel things.  It did the “love letter to cinema” thing that seemed to be the point of this year’s ceremony (and is always good).  It had a really good story.  It had really good characters.  It had beautiful everything-it-won-for, yes, but I wanted it to win so much more.  And I feel like people didn’t know what to make of it.  People thought it was just a kids’ movie, maybe, or they thought it was too weird, or it was too techie-something.  (Which is funny, considering that some movies that have been just techie have gotten buzz as being Great Films for that very reason.)  But it wasn’t.  It was a movie about kids, but it was a movie about adults too.  It was a movie about kids that weren’t too stupid or too, too precocious (I mean, they were precocious, but not in the painful way).  It was a movie that was strange, but strange is good.  It was a movie that had a lot of visual effects and hyperrealism, but this assisted the story.  It was a book that was, in part, about a filmmaker’s robot, for crying out loud.  Of course there were going to be special effects.  It took place in a world that wasn’t quite our own, stylistically, but it was never distracting.  It was beautiful.  It was a fairy tale for grown-ups that happened to have children and robots in it, but it was brilliant.

The Iron Lady (Actress in a Leading Role [Meryl Streep], Makeup)
I have not seen this.  But really.  From what I can see, the makeup had very good street makeup, very good age makeup, very good fake teeth for Meryl Streep.  But again that is not the same as transforming people into convincing-looking goblins or something.  Or, barring that, transforming Glenn Close and Janet Teers into semi-convincing pseudomen.

Midnight in Paris (Writing [Original Screenplay])
I don’t know what I would have actually done in this category.  I can’t, with honesty, do the thing that a lot of people have and say “oh, Bridesmaids,” because I… have unresolved feelings about that movie.  But I do appreciate that it was women being funny for a while, and that was good.  I didn’t see two of the nominees.  (I’d never even heard of Margin Call.)  But I don’t really know if this sits well with me, either.  Woody Allen can write Woody Allen, I feel like.  Here, he had the one “complex, artistic” male protagonist, and a cast of shallow supporting characters.  All of the women (and most of the men) may as well have been paper dolls.  It wasn’t exactly predictable, from the beginning, but once it got going I could see through it.  It was very pretty, but it wasn’t… again, I didn’t feel anything.

The Muppets (Music [Original Song])
In short, YES.

Thank you, Academy, for not giving any of these awards to War Horse or Moneyball, which were, again, serviceable films, but not the best in any of their categories.  No thanks for not putting on a great show (other bloggers discuss this much better than I could, so I won’t).

–your fangirl heroine.

Superlative Sunday :: the 2012 SAG Awards and how I feel about them

I will discuss the winners that I can, but I will put the list of films I haven’t yet and do need to see first this time.

The Help
The Artist
maybe Moneyball, maybe
Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close
The Descendents
My Week With Marilyn
Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy (hopefully soon)

Outstanding Performance by a Male Actor in a Supporting Role
Given, like the Golden Globe, to Christopher Plummer in Beginners.  Hurrah, I say.  I vote for him in the Oscars, both because I haven’t seen the other movies yet and because I don’t think I’ll care much about most of them.

Outstanding Performance by a Stunt Ensemble in a Motion Picture
Given to Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 2.  Hurrah, I say.  I’d have been good with X-Men: First Class too, so that was a good 40% chance.  (Sadly, I’ve seen all the movies in this category, but I fail at seeing the more “legitimate” ones I guess.)

Outstanding Performance by a Female Actor in a Television Movie or Miniseries
Surprise surprise, they gave it to Kate Winslet.  Well, okay.  I love her, even if I hated Mildred Pierce, and hopefully this is the last time I have to reiterate that fact.

Outstanding Performance by a Male Actor in a Drama Series
Given to Steve Buscemi in Boardwalk Empire.  Thank the lord, because he deserves the hell out of it.

Outstanding Performance by a Female Actor in a Drama Series
Given to Jessica Lange in American Horror Story.  Thank the lord, because the other four shows are about politics and lawyers, and I don’t care.  Although this does make me ponder the strangeness of them not having a supporting category for television.  Because her role was definitely more supporting.  Very, very well-performed, but supporting.

Outstanding Performance by an Ensemble in a Drama Series
Given to Boardwalk Empire.  And rightly so, they are brilliant every one of them.  Even if it’s kind of more a case of Steve Buscemi closely followed by Michael Pitt and Kelly Macdonald followed by a few fairly important characters followed by everyone else, and, say, Game of Thrones is a bunch of stories getting equal time and play and I’d have been all right with them winning too, but hey.

Outstanding Performance by an Ensemble in a Comedy Series
Given to Modern Family.  Which I don’t watch.  Which didn’t surprise me.  Which made me sad, because I wanted The Big Bang Theory to win so so hard.  I’ve fallen in love with them lately.

Outstanding Performance by a Stunt Ensemble in a Television Series
Given to Game of Thrones.  At least they get this one.

–your fangirl heroine.

Film Friday :: 2011 in film (4 opinions, 2 predictable favorites, 3 adorable [pairs of] people, 3 awesome cameos, 2 kickass people)

Opinions
4. Christina Hendricks’ talents were wasted in Drive.
I still… don’t really know how I felt about this movie.  Apparently, the processing process is still in effect.  But I do know that my baby could have been given a lot more to do.  She is so capable of so so much.

3. Ian McShane’s talents were wasted in Pirates.
I mean, he was the best thing in the movie, by a long shot, but they still didn’t know what to do with him and his awesome.  Yeah.

2. I’m still a cynical bitch about romantic comedies.
Even the ones that I can logically say that I liked more than the rest, I don’t feel compelled to ever see again.  Crazy, Stupid, Love.: it was cute, and until the end, it didn’t suck, but just… no.  Once was enough.

1. Haters of Sucker Punch to the left.
I mean, I get why people don’t groove on it.  Like I get why people don’t groove on Repo or something.  But… see, the thing is, I actually don’t think it’s just some fetishy fanboy wet dream.  Yes, they’re young women kicking people’s asses. Yes, they’re doing so in a lot of tight, short clothing.  No, Lisa Schwartzbaum of Entertainment Weekly, they are not “psycho sluts.”  In the first reality, yes, it’s a mental hospital.  But that doesn’t automatically mean psycho.  They don’t really go around killing people for fun, they’re just setting themselves free.  And save the deleted scene between the High Roller (Jon Hamm) and Babydoll (Emily Browning), you don’t see any of them actually partaking in sexual behavior except dancing and that time that Rocket (Jena Malone) almost gets raped and Amber (Jamie Chung) sitting on that guy’s lap.  So, uhm… sluts?  How?  It’s not bad to partake in sexual behavior, far from, but it’s not really cool to judge someone in that fashion, or judge a movie in that fashion.  It’s a chicks-kicking-ass movie, and it’s stylized, and it’s weird, and… yeah, I get why it’s not for everyone.  But I have developed a strange protectiveness over it.

Predictable favorites
2. Hugo
Gorramit, this movie was adorable.  I do tend to like love letters to filmmaking, and I love period pieces, and it was stylistic, and there was a steampunk robot and Chloe Moretz.  A recipe for win.

1. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 2
There was never any question about if I’d like this movie or not.  I mean, there are things I still wish were there, but… it made me cry.  Nothing makes me cry.  That’s magic in and of itself. 

Adorable (pairs of) people
3. Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Anna Kendrick (50/50)
Predictable, maybe (especially because I like both of them: Anna Kendrick is one of the only forgivable things about Twilight, Joseph Gord0n-Levitt is unquestionably endearing).  But true.

2. Amy Adams (The Muppets)
Again, true.

1. Kat Dennings (Thor)
Yeah, I get it.  Darcy was a brat, a little.  But she was just a damn precious brat.  With precious glasses.  And honestly, her reactions to all of the superhero stuff seemed silly because that’s not how a lot of people in movies act, but it’s how a lot of real people would probably act. 

Awesome cameos
3. Jon Hamm (Sucker Punch)
Because if you watch the deleted scene with the High Roller, it’s… kind of completely different than how it seemed in the theatrical release.  Baby’s just like… “oh okay, I guess I’ll have this intimate time with you now,” and it’s consensual, and it’s good.  It makes sense why the doctor then says that when he was lobotomizing her, it’s almost like she wanted him to do it.  And Jon Hamm is just… all kinds of good.

2. Jim Parsons (The Muppets)
Spoiler alert, finally.  I don’t think there could have been a better humanized nerdy Muppet man than Jim Parsons.

1. Nathan Fillion (Super)
Nathan Fillion anywhere would have been brilliant, but Nathan Fillion in a terrible wig and a cheap-ass super-suit?  In what just may have been the most effed-up movie of the year?  Priceless.

Kickass people
2. Matthew Lewis (Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 2)
Neville my darling.  My badass darling.  Coming into his own, being so heroic and amazing.

1. Hayley Atwell (Captain America)
Peggy Carter my darling.  Being so efficient, so adorable, kicking ass and taking names and everything.  She is perfection.

So yeah.  Brief synopses and one giant, giant, 24% of the overall post word-wise tl;dr.

–your fangirl heroine.

Superlative Sunday :: the 2012 People’s Choice Awards nominations

Like a good fangeek, I went to cast my votes for the People’s Choice Awards nominees when they were selecting them.  I wanted to make sure there would be some nominees I cared about.  I just… couldn’t care about so many of the prospective nominees.  I was, predictably, all gung ho for the cable television drama nominees, but I skipped most of the network drama and comedy nominees; film was a similar case.  And for music, as evidenced by my various statistics in weeks past, I just voted for Adele whenever I could and skipped everything else.

So, here’s a list of the official nominees I actually care about.

CATEGORIES I CANNOT JUDGE: Favorite Drama Movie, Favorite Comedic Movie Actor, Favorite Animated Movie Voice, Favorite Network TV Drama, Favorite TV Drama Actress, Favorite TV Competition Show, Favorite Daytime TV Host, Favorite Late Night TV Host, Favorite TV Celebreality Star, Favorite Male Artist, Favorite Pop Artist, Favorite Hip-Hop Artist, Favorite R&B Artist, Favorite Band, Favorite Country Artist, Favorite Tour Headliner.

Favorite Movie:
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 2

Favorite Movie Actor:
I have enjoyed films that feature all of them (Daniel Radcliffe, Hugh Jackman, Johnny Depp, Robert Pattinson [because he was in Goblet of Fire], and Ryan Reynolds) but I would not give any of them this vote.  Nope.

Favorite Movie Actress:
Please Emma Stone forever.  The more I think about her and see her in things, the more I love her.

Favorite Movie Icon:
There is no definition of “icon,” is there?  Morgan Freeman is a badass narrator, though, so I guess I vote him?

Favorite Action Movie:
Here, I am torn.  Part of me wants to vote Deathly Hallows always, but part of me wants to vote X-Men: First Class, because it is wonderful and brilliant.

Favorite Action Movie Star:
The title of the category doesn’t specify “male,” but apparently you have to be a male to be nominated.  It’s 40% of the same actors in the Favorite Movie Actor category, and the others don’t even warrant mentioning.

Favorite Comedy Movie:
By Emma Stone+Liza Lapira best friends default, I vote Crazy, Stupid, Love.  I guess.

Favorite Comedic Movie Actress:
Again, Emma Stone for everything.  (Though I think it’s funny to call Natalie Portman a “comedic” movie actress based on one or two films.)

Favorite Movie Star Under 25:
It’s kinda just Chloe Moretz vs. everyone from Harry Potter, and as much as I love everyone from Harry Potter, Chloe Moretz is a baby badass and I adore her.

Favorite Ensemble Movie Cast:
Same problem as in Favorite Action Movie.

Favorite Movie Superhero:
Why does Mystique count as a hero if Magneto doesn’t?  They both try to do hero things, then go “bad” by the end.  I vote for James McAvoy instead.  (ALL THE X-MEN.)

Favorite Book Adaptation:
Harry Potter.  Again.  Always.

Favorite TV Drama Actor:
Nathan Fillion can have every vote, right?  (Even if I’m not up to current on Castle yet.)

Favorite Network TV Comedy:
I’ve only seen a few episodes of The Big Bang Theory, but I’ll give it my vote.

Favorite TV Comedy Actor:
Jim Parsons and Neil Patrick Harris get my votes on principle.

Favorite TV Comedy Actress:
I don’t watch 30 Rock, but I loved Tina Fey on SNL, so, again, on principle.

Favorite Cable TV Comedy:
Weeds, please.

Favorite TV Crime Drama:
Castle.  Always and forever.

Favorite Sci-Fi/Fantasy Show:
True Blood and The Walking Dead are both really more “horror,” but they both get votes from my heart.  (A little more for True Blood.)

Favorite TV Guest Star:
I will allow this one win for Glee, just for Kristin Chenoweth’s street cred.

Favorite New TV Drama:
Pan Am for the clothes, Ringer for the camp.

Favorite New TV Comedy:
2 Broke Girls for the snarky Kat Dennings, New Girl for the nerdtastic Zooey Deschanel.

Favorite Female Artist, Favorite Song of the Year, Favorite Album of the Year, Favorite Music Video:
Some combination of Adele, “Rolling in the Deep,” and 21.  (And I haven’t even seen the video.)

–your fangirl heroine.

Fictional Friday :: 10 more cross-canon crack friendships that should be.

This is still ridiculous.  But it still happens in my head.

10. Kate Gregson (Brie Larson, United States of Tara) and Jessica Hamby (Deborah Ann Woll, True Blood)
I don’t even know.  Kate would be doing her stewardess thing and maybe, since this is some demented alternate universe, she’d be stewardessing for one of those vampire-friendly planes.  I don’t even know why I feel like these two would get along; they’d be really easily frustrated with each other, but I think they both need a girlfriend, and they could appreciate each other’s existences.  Kate would of course big sister it, they’d swap crazy family and crazy love life stories, it would be good for them.

9. Anya Jenkins (Emma Caulfield, Buffy the Vampire Slayer) and Pam de Beaufort (Kristin Bauer van Straten, True Blood)
Sure, there would be that moment where Anya’s going, “Oh, you’re a vampire.  That’s potentially bad and I might have to slay you if Buffy isn’t here,” and Pam’s going, “Fat chance, sugar,” but once they got past that awkwardness, I feel like these two would really get along.  They both have that same sarcastic sense of humor that tends to permeate their very existence.  Anya doesn’t always know how to “be human,” Pam ignores the concept of playing nice entirely.  They’d be over in the corner snarking all the time, Anya would give Pam unwanted business tips re: Fangtasia, Pam would roll her eyes at everything Anya said, they’d have a system.  It’d be that friendship where you argue all the time to show you like a person, but that’s how Anya and Pam both operate.

8. Faith Lehane (Eliza Dushku, Buffy the Vampire Slayer) and Sweet Pea (Abbie Cornish, Sucker Punch)
They’re both resistant to friendship, yes, but they both need someone.  Since neither of them is prone to graciously accepting anything, and both of them are super-tough and can take care of themselves, they’d be a good pair, I think.  Sweet Pea would get out of the institution and she and Faith would go on an epic redemptive ass-kicking mission all around the country, defending themselves and others from assholes both supernatural and normal.

7. Adelle DeWitt (Olivia Williams, Dollhouse) and Rupert Giles (Anthony Stewart Head, Buffy the Vampire Slayer)
These two.  Oh, man.  They went to college together, I can just see it: they were neighbors, and they hated each other for at least six months, but it was that hating that grows into “we’re actually well suited to be friends.”  (They maybe tried sex once or twice, too, but that just wasn’t gonna happen.)  They occasionally wrote each other over the years, and they were amused when they realized they were both eventually stuck in California.  They’d have phone dates where they were wry and sarcastic and vague about their lives, and they’d both be drinking while they did so, ‘cause Giles would only think to call Adelle when he was heading down the road to drunkenness (which would amuse her, not that she’d ever say so).

6. Topher Brink (Fran Kranz, Dollhouse) and Willow Rosenberg (Alyson Hannigan, Buffy the Vampire Slayer)
Largely thanks to this.  Topher and Willow both understand the whole “oops, almost ended the world/accidentally ended the world” thing, and they both understand watching bullets hit the love of their lives right in front of them.  Theirs would be a friendship based largely in mutual commiseration; also a mutual tendency to occasionally make situationally inappropriate pop cultural references and to say things that go over everyone else’s heads.

5, 4. Kim Pine (Alison Pill, Scott Pilgrim Vs. the World) and Max Black (Kat Dennings, 2 Broke Girls) OR Ivy (Liza Lapira, Dollhouse)
Kim needs more girl buddies.  In the comics there’s Lisa, who I adore, and she’s friendly with Ramona (Mary Elizabeth Winstead), yes, but it’s not a close relationship.  Kim and Max would just be having these endless sarcasm battles forever, wherein they openly despised everyone and everything around them.  They’d bitch about all of the people they have to be consistent for, they’d bitch about all of the idiot children populating their lives.  They should be pen pals.  Then they could just write pages and pages of “by the way, this is ridiculous” rambling about their lives and vent to each other.
Kim and Ivy would get on for that same “why are we so consistent” reasons.  Ivy needs more girl buddies, too; she needs a place to go “WHY IS EVERYONE AROUND ME INSANE?” and “WHY DO THEY UNDERVALUE ME SO MUCH?”  Kim would understand that.  She feels undervalued, too, and she’s not inquisitive enough to ask Ivy questions about exactly what it is that she does for money, which Ivy would appreciate.  Ivy’s occasionally sarcastic, too, even if she doesn’t always go as obvious about it.

3. Alpha (Alan Tudyk, Dollhouse) and YoSaffBridge (Christina Hendricks, Firefly)
I can’t even explain how much I want this criminal partnership to exist.  (And there’s a part of me that’s sure that YoSaffBridge is a composited Doll, or she could be… which would be even better.)  Between the two of them, they probably know every single thing about crime, period, and they could pull off such epic crimes.  Alpha would encourage her to expand her efforts beyond conning various men, and they’d travel throughout everywhere killing people and stealing from them and being sadistic nutcases.  And it would be beautiful.

2. Tara Knowles (Maggie Siff, Sons of Anarchy) and Simon Tam (Sean Maher, Firefly)
DOCTOR BUDDIES.  These two would meet at med school, and since he’s not a creep who wants in her pants, and she’s not annoying, and they’re both hyperprofessional at times, they’d form a sort of working friendship that would be consistent and good.  And since they’re both livin’ the outlaw life now, because this is some universe where the crew of Serenity is in modern times or the Sons are in the future (they totally run their own planet), they’d help each other out.  If the crew raided some hospitals, Simon would call Tara up and be like “Hey, we’ve got some drugs, you need any?”  If the crew needed some emergency medical help and they were by the planet that the Sons run, Tara would be right there to offer something that they didn’t have, special surgical tools or something.

1. Shosanna Dreyfus (Melanie Laurent, Inglourious Basterds) and Erik Lennsherr (Michael Fassbender, X-Men: First Class)
All I can say is that this epic Nazi-hunting party needs to happen.  Now.  (Also, if this is happening, can I just say that Shosanna should have pyrokinetic powers?  She should.)  They could go around Europe killing Nazis that deserve to die and wearing snappy vintage clothes, Shosh would teach Erik about films, they’d speak every language together, it would just be beautiful and perfect and messed up and amazing.

–your fangirl heroine.

Fictional Friday :: 10 characters I love for living by their own unique moral code

10. Al Swearengen (Ian McShane, Deadwood)
I feel like it’s difficult to write about him without dropping some very extreme language, but I’ll do my damnedest.  As you will see, “unique moral code” often means abiding by some kind of moral code, but one that allows you to shoot people or something.  Not necessarily legal in the strictest sense.  And this is Al’s brilliance.  He is the definition of “above the law,” and even when… uhm.  Law-abiding straightedges like Bullock try to question his behavior, he shrugs it off.  He’s beyond all that.  Doesn’t mean he doesn’t have a sense of what he finds right: the man certainly has a sense of loyalty, albeit usually to his own best interest, and he doesn’t want to see the camp pansy-assed and ruined by too much civilization.

9. Shosanna Dreyfus (Melanie Laurent, Inglourious Basterds)
Is being upset that Nazis killed your family rational and sane behavior in the eyes of the law?  Yes.  Is swearing revenge against all Nazis rational and sane?  Debatable.  Is burning down your place of business to kill a crap ton of Nazis and killing yourself and your lover in the process rational and sane?  Well, not really.  But as far as Shosanna’s concerned, the answer to numbers two and three on that questionnaire are an emphatic yes.  She’s determined to get her revenge, and there’s no cost too steep.  She’ll kill whoever gets in her way, because it’s for a just cause.  And when just causes are the case, there’s nothing that shouldn’t be done.

8. Beatrix Kiddo/The Bride/Black Mamba (Uma Thurman, Kill Bill)
It’s sort of the same as above.  Is being upset that your former lover and former coworkers tried to kill you, put you in a coma, and took your unborn baby from you rational and sane behavior in the eyes of the law?  Yes.  Is swearing revenge against your former lover and former coworkers rational and sane?  Debatable.  Is going on a killing spree, attacking not only said former lover and former coworkers but all of their present associates until you reach the desired end, rational and sane?  Well, probably not.  But to Beatrix, who lives life by a warrior code of sorts, when your honor has been questioned, you do seek revenge, and probably bloody, bloody revenge at that.

7, 6. Adelle Dewitt and Topher Brink (Olivia Williams and Fran Kranz, Dollhouse)
“Unique” for different reasons.  Both of them go on sort of a moral code journey over the series.  Adelle, like Al, always has her best interests at heart, and she has the best interests of those in her care at heart, ultimately.  Sure, she’s willing to let their personalities be erased and give them over for sex and near-death situations regularly, but when something’s got the possibility to grievously harm an Active she is there to put a stop to it, and when something does harm an Active, well.  That something (or someone) is gonna die a brutal death, no questions asked.

My Topher’s a different story.  At first, he seems to have no morals at all.  He’s just blissfully playing with toys. But as time goes on, he’s decidedly more concerned about those around him.  He’s upset when they’re harmed, and he’s gonna do what he must to prevent that from happening.  Even when that means punching the love of his life in the face, or remote-wiping and exploding his double-crossing former boss.  His actions aren’t particularly legal, ever, but he’s doing what he thinks right.

5. The Sons of Anarchy and associates (Ron Perlman as Clay, Charlie Hunnam as Jax, Katey Sagal as Gemma, Maggie Siff as Tara, jaysus there’s a ton of them, so here’s the imdb page)
The whole point of the Sons is outlaw justice.  They’re not above shooting a bitch to prevent something more harmful in the long run from happening, to avenge someone, hell, even to make a point.  They’re gonna beat people up whenever they damn well please.  They’re gonna sell guns, they’re gonna produce porn, they’re gonna drink and screw and have a merry time.  But they definitely have a sense of right and wrong: they’re loyal to the others in the club and the families of those in the club, and they do what they must for their people.

4. Hit-Girl/Mindy Macready (Chloe Moretz, Kick-Ass)
Babygirl means to do right by the world.  She’s gonna take down criminals because they’re criminals… but calling the cops is so overrated when beating them up and stabbing them and smooshing them in a car-crushing machine are also options.  It’s slightly sadistic, it’s slightly messed up, it’s slightly not legal either, but it’s what’s right.  Why not have a little twisted fun?

3. Dr. Horrible (Neil Patrick Harris, Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog)
Technically, the good doctor is a supervillain.  He’s aiming for membership in the Evil League of Evil, after all.  But he’s way less of a d-bag than the heroes around (“Captain Hammer, corporate tool” anyone?) and he does have a kind of code.  “Killing isn’t elegant or creative.  It’s not my style.”  Sure, he’s not acknowledging that killing is also wrong both morally and legally, but he’s not interested in doing it. He’d rather reform things with his evil power than destroy them completely.  And that’s… kind of neat.

2. Magneto/Erik Lensherr (Michael Fassbender, X-Men: First Class)
I specify baby Magneto ‘cause by the time he’s old and Ian McKellen he’s… pretty much straight-up a bad guy.  But as a younger man, Erik’s got much the same mindset as Shosanna, actually.  Nazis have killed his family, and he wants revenge.  He also wants revenge on those who persecute those who are different, superhuman.  He doesn’t believe peaceful coexistence can happen, and he’d rather assert himself than curl up in a ball in the corner.  Is his viewpoint a bit skewed?  Well, yeah.  But he’s thought about it.  It’s not just a snap judgment, it’s based on lots of empirical evidence.  And if a few innocent bystanders have to get killed in the process of him making his point, so be it.

1. Malcolm Reynolds … and by extension, the rest of the crew (Nathan Fillion and everyone else, Firefly/Serenity)
“If I ever kill you, you’ll be awake. You’ll be facing me, and you’ll be armed.”

“Someone ever tries to kill you, you try to kill ‘em right back.”

“I aim to misbehave.”

Mal is the ultimate antihero.  He doesn’t follow the law; far from it, especially considering the Alliance’s law is kinda gō se.  He’s not afraid to kill a person or a lot of people, though he doesn’t like when innocent folk meet their end on account of him.  He’s willing to sacrifice his own life, but he doesn’t like when other sacrifice theirs for him.  The man just wants to live his life, and he doesn’t much care if his life is that of a criminal, it’s the life that suits him.  He’s going to do what he must to make sure people know how absolutely gorram stupid the unjust laws are, but he’s got his own code of loyalty mixed with a certain soldier’s sense of what’s right.

“Are you willing to die for your beliefs?”
“I am… ‘course, that ain’t exactly plan A.”

–your fangirl heroine.

Spectacular Summaries Saturday :: the summer movie round-up

For my purposes, summer at the movies begins mid-May and ends… last week.  That’s about the timeframe for hauling out “summer” movies (I say that in quotations because some don’t fit and some are trying to hard to fit in what makes a successful summer blockbuster).  I’m categorizing and therefore judging.  Bolded titles in every category have won the category.

The contenders (summer movies I saw)
Thor
Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides
Bridesmaids
The Hangover, Part II
X-Men: First Class
Super 8
Green Lantern
Transformers: Dark of the Moon
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 2
Captain America
Cowboys & Aliens
Our Idiot Brother
Fright Night

Superhero movies!
Thor
X-Men: First Class
Green Lantern
Captain America
This one would have been close if X-Men hadn’t been out.  Thor and Captain America both have the bonus of leading up to The Avengers, which I am geeking for like a boss, and they were both pretty good.  Thor had glassesy Kat Dennings and direction by Kenneth Branagh, Captain America had badass red-lipstick-and-pencil-skirty Hayley Atwell and the killing of supernatural Nazis.  But X-Men was set in the 1960s, starred a crap ton of attractive people that I have infatuations with to varying degrees (James McAvoy, Michael Fassbender, Rose Byrne, Nicholas Hoult…), featured a whole load of fun moral gray areas, was badass, was directed by Matthew Vaughn… clear winner.

Sequels!
Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides
The Hangover, Part II
X-Men: First Class (ish)
Transformers: Dark of the Moon
I say ish for X-Men because it’s sort of a prequel, but it still wins.  The other three were very of their franchise.  Pirates was a lot like the first three Pirates movies, except it had the advantages of being minus Orlando Bloom and plus Ian McShane.  The Hangover was exactly like the first Hangover, except it was in Bangkok instead of Vegas.  Transformers was a lot like the first two Transformers movies, except it had the advantages of being minus Megan Fox and plus Alan Tudyk.  X-Men wins in my opinion because it tried to do something different with itself.  You could argue that’s easy, given the prequel nature, but Wolverine was a prequel and it was still pretty similar.  (Not in a bad way necessarily, I am a giant fan of the franchise [probably another reason this was a given] but it was.)

Comedies!
Bridesmaids
The Hangover, Part II
Our Idiot Brother
This is a tricky category, because every one of these movies sort of made me want to slap some bitches a few times.  But Our Idiot Brother only made me want to slap the characters; the actors and writers were mostly imaginary slap-free.  Bridesmaids and The Hangover made me want to slap the characters and the writers both; the former because I am just so freakishly sick of women movies being hailed as great stories of sisterhood or whatever when really they’re doing nothing but buying dresses and bitching each other out, the latter because it was, as mentioned, exactly the same as its predecessor.  They were all occasionally funny, but I laughed the most and the hardest at Our Idiot Brother.

Action!
Thor
Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides
X-Men: First Class
Green Lantern
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 2
Transformers: Dark of the Moon
Captain America
Cowboys & Aliens
Well, I’m giving every award ever to X-Men, so I decided I should mix this one up a little.  All superhero movies, regardless of how little action they actually have, are often categorized as action movies; all of these had some pretty epic fight scenes, but again with the mixing it up.  And Cowboys & Aliens had gunfights, alien fights, AND space explosions.  The others can’t say that.  So most diverse action!  Harry Potter ties in, because of epic magic battles.  And just my need to give it some win out of intense love.

And now begins the chosen from everything awards.

Sexiest cast: X-Men, obviously.  You have McAvoy for the cocky intelligent pretty-boy thing, Fassbender for the smoldering vengeful brilliant antihero thing, Hoult for the a-freaking-dorable nerdboy thing, Byrne for the brainy brunette thing, Jennifer Lawrence for the cute blonde/sexy mutant thing, January Jones for the ice queen thing, Zoe Kravitz for the exotic thing, the other X-boys for their own things… there’s something for everyone.

Girlcrush created: Hayley Atwell as Peggy Carter in Captain America.  I appreciated her in Pillars of the Earth, but I legitimately crushed on her here.  Kickass British vintage women win always.

Girlcrush intensified: Kat Dennings as Darcy in Thor, of course.  If that wasn’t evidenced by my repeated mentions of her in her glasses, she’s also the funniest thing in the movie.  Way more interesting than Natalie Portman’s Jane, too.

Girlcrush allowing me to forgive your character: Zooey Deschanel as Nat in Our Idiot Brother.  She messed up her relationship with the also-adorable Cindy (Rashida Jones) all over the place, but damned if I don’t still sort of love her.

Mancrush created: Nicholas Hoult as Hank/Beast in X-Men.  More at the beginning of the movie, because I have a harder time being attracted to him after he’s an accidental jerk to Raven (Lawrence).  But when he’s all 😀 SCIENCEGEEKING! and sweatervesty and glassesy, oh yeah.

Mancrush intensified: Michael Fassbender as Erik/Magneto in X-Men.  I sorta had a thing for him since Basterds, but damn can that man wear a suit!  Also, I find his ability to speak so many languages massively sexy.  And though it’s not the easiest to deal with in real life, I find moral grayness more interesting than black or white in fiction.

Mancrush allowing me to forgive your character: Anton Yelchin as Charlie in Fright Night, at the beginning of the movie mostly.  He manned up and geeked out as it went on, but he was sort of lame and trying to be cool at the start.

Epic bromance: Charles (McAvoy) and Erik (Fassbender) in X-Men.  This one is pretty straightforward.

Fail bromance: Stu (Ed Helms), Phil (Bradley Cooper), Alan (Zach Galifinakis), and Doug (Justin Bartha) in The Hangover, Part II.  Fail because they repeated the exact same mistakes they made last time, fail because they behaved completely like people do not behave ever, fail because they weren’t really that amiable towards each other, and fail because they left Justin Bartha out of a lot of screen time.

Epic ladybromance: …for what it’s worth, Megan (Melissa McCarthy) towards anyone in Bridesmaids.  She was the only one of the women who was actually good at being a friend, really.

Fail ladybromance: Annie (Kristin Wiig), Lillian (Maya Rudolph), Helen (Rose Byrne), and… well, all the rest of them in Bridesmaids.  They were all just awful friends towards each other, which I’ve already ranted on plenty.

Epic romance: Moira (Rose Byrne) and Charles (McAvoy) in X-Men.  Not that we saw any of it except for that one kiss, but I was so very into it.  Also Ron (Rupert Grint) and Hermione (Emma Watson) in Harry Potter, because they finally kissed and they’re finally together and aw.

Epic fail romance: Nat (Deschanel) and Cindy (Jones) in Our Idiot Brother.  Epic fail meaning they were so cute, and then failing just had to go and happen.

Fail romance: Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp) and Angelina (Penelope Cruz) in Pirates.  Annie (Wiig) and Ted (Jon Hamm) in Bridesmaids.  Sam (Shia LaBeouf) and Carly (Rosie Huntington-Whitely) in Transformers.  Need I go on?

Most wasted performer: Ian McShane as Blackbeard in Pirates.  He did everything he could, bless his heart, but he still didn’t have enough to work with.  Not for his brilliance.

Most intense emotional reaction: the entirety of Harry Potter.  Because of everyone who died, because of the story, because of the battling, because now it’s over and I’m sad.  Because it was just perfect.

Best diversion from canon: Neville (Matthew Lewis) and Luna (Evanna Lynch) in Harry Potter, because it’s obvious, we all know that they should have been together and they so totally had the feelings.

Eager anticipation incited: thanks to Captain America, for The Avengers, of course.

–your fangirl heroine.

Spoiler Alert Saturday :: my thoughts on X-Men: First Class

In short, oh yes.  I have always been fond of the X-Men franchise; this was probably at least somewhat due to my crush on Bobby (Shawn Ashmore) and my ladycrush on Rogue (Anna Paquin) back in the day (this also could account for why I didn’t like the third one as much, the fail of them within).  This is also because I am kind of a weird sucker for superhero movies that aren’t excessively idiotic, and I will give them all at least a try.  And I like ensembles of weirdos, so.

Because of this, and because I love the 1960s so hard it hurts, and because I love James McAvoy and Michael Fassbender and also Rose Byrne when she’s not being stupid, I was pretty excited for First Class.  And I was not let down, man oh man.

So, some thoughts that range from abstract to somewhat clear:

• James.  McAvoy.  Oh, yeah.  Bluuuue eyes, that cute sorta cocky but not douchey thing he had going at first.
• Michael Fassbender.  Dammit, I felt so weird thinking Magneto was kinda sexy, but I did.  He was all badass.  He was all speaking like a billion languages, which is a total turn-on.
• And I was pleasantly surprised by Nicholas Hoult as Beast.  Pre-bluification, oh man, my type much?  Glasses?  Nerdbabbling?  Sciencebabbling?  Intelligence and a random aptitude for piloting?  Sweatervests?
• McAvoy and Fassbender’s Charles and Erik had such a freakin’ epic bromance going.
• And McAvoy and Rose Byrne’s Moira (a character who was Olivia Williams in X3, so automatically I was sort of rooting for her – also, brainy women?  Yes please) had amazing freakin’ chemistry.  I was just sitting there the entire time going shipshipshipshipship.
• Hugh Jackman’s little pissy-ass Logan cameo was happy-making.
• Hey, the plot was super great.
• Matthew Vaughn (Kick-Ass, for example) doesn’t fail.  I’m adding him to my list of failsafe directors now.
• It was the sixties.  That meant clothes, that meant styles, that meant vibe, that meant yes.
• I’m a sucker for origin stories, so I loved seeing all the kids sitting around coming up with their codenames.  Jennifer Lawrence’s Raven/Mystique was so adorable when she was all “And you should be… Magneto! :D”
• …lol, apparently Professor X’s brain is a remote wipe device.  I am fully aware that was possibly the dorkiest sentence this blog has ever contained.
• Surprisingly, I didn’t want to punch January Jones’ Emma too too much.  I mean, yes, she was an evil bitch, and all icy-cold diamondy, but — she was supposed to be, she filled her purpose.  And she is good at being eye candy, which she got to do a lot of.  I had to tell my mom afterwards just to ignore the appearance of Kayla Silverfox’s sister!Emma in Wolverine, because, uhm, fail, completely not canon-appropriate.  Better just to not pay attention and go with crazy bitch January Jones in the 1960s.
• And Kevin Bacon makes a good creeper.  After this and Super, I’m beginning to think that should just be his thing.

–your fangirl heroine.