Tag Archives: agents of shield

Marvel Monday :: our thoughts on season 5 of Agents of SHIELD

21 May

This season of Agents of SHIELD had the great advantage of airing after Inhumans, which would make most anything look good. This season of Agents of SHIELD was good in and of itself, although incredibly draining and at times almost overwhelmingly dark in ways that attacked us, personally, but it’s sort of like how watching Infinity War like a week after we finally watched Justice League helped matters significantly.

So, our usual breakdown shall ensue.

  • Daisy (Chloe Bennet) sort of got her own arc this season! Which is to say, she got the destruction of the world pinned on her because of her powers and she had to fight her way out of a network of creepy blue aliens who used spoopy tech and Ben Wa balls instead of fighting fair. And she also gracefully stepped down from the role that Coulson was encouraging her towards, Director of SHIELD, which is good because even though my girl would be a great Director, she also needs a break really badly.
  • Jemma (Elizabeth Henstridge) really needs to only go to space when she wants to from now on because she also needs a break. Said creepy blue aliens literally had her enslaved for a few episodes, not to mention deafened to all but the leader’s voice by said spoopy tech, and that was viscerally horrifying (the aliens enslaved people for general reasons and also Inhumans for low-rate gladiatorial purposes, and all of this was horrifying) but she got to do sort of a Princess Leia move and that was good. Then came the compulsory heterosexuality, which was not good. It was not good because romantic FitzSimmons is one of our least favorite things here, and Fitz (Iain De Caestecker) himself was literally the worst (again regarding Daisy), and it took up way too much of Jemma’s screentime in the back half of the season especially. Also, you can’t just establish that Lance Hunter (Nick Blood) can pop out of exile to help Fitz with a mission and then not invite him and Bobbi (Adrianne Palicki) to the abruptly rushed terrible FitzSimmons wedding (honestly our thoughts about episode 100 are not favorable in general but the wedding is cringeworthy), except they did and I call bullshit.
  • Melinda (Ming-Na Wen) kicked her usual amount of ass, had more than her usual amount of UST with Coulson (Clark Gregg), and also had a subplot where she got to be a mom. I am not into the idea of every woman having to be a mother, but we know it’s something Melinda at least used to really want and since Bahrain doubted her capabilities for, so watching her act as a mom to Robin (Lexy Kolker, Ava Kolker, and Willow Hale at respective ages) in the somewhat hypothetical future timeline was unexpectedly heartwrenching. And I guess she and Coulson are finally gonna BOOOOOONE, but hey, we don’t have to watch it, so I’m okay.
  • Elena (Natalia Cordova-Buckley) spent her time in the future mostly working and helping a couple of sad space kids named Flint (Coy Stewart) and Tess (Eve Harlow) and being in love with Mack (Henry Simmons). Then in the midseason finale we found out that a future version of her had been captured by the creepy blue aliens and at some point lost her arms and knew what would happen and gave warnings. Thus, the second half of the season, once they were back in the present, was mostly devoted to trying to get the team to follow her future self’s warnings. And also dealing with the fact that she did in fact get her arms cut off (horrifyingly) and replaced with robot prosthetics (which created some drama but ultimately were useful and good). She and Mack also had a lot of debates about, essentially, morality, which was interesting. They’re very good and gay together.
  • In the first half of the season, our villains were the aforementioned creepy blue aliens. They’re Kree and they all majorly sucked, and sometimes it was funny (like the fact that Sinara [Florence Faivre] literally fought with magical Ben Wa balls, that was funny) and sometimes it was horrifying (Kasius [Dominic Rains] was basically blue Joffrey who didn’t like to get his hands dirty and when he was injured and later murdered I cheered). But they paled in comparison to…
  • In the second half of the season, we were introduced to Ruby (Dove Cameron), who was basically a baby Hydra super soldier, or if you prefer, female Kylo Ren. Her mother, General Hale (played by Catherine Dent – the character doesn’t get a first name because MCU mothers don’t matter I guess), was impregnated with dubious consent by some super creepy Hydra higher-ups and basically Ruby was raised to be the perfect soldier. Except they forgot that when you do that you basically get Kylo Ren, who has zero control over their emotions or interest in being at all reasonable or adhering to anything but their own moral code. Great job, guys. Anyway, she’s basically like if you crossed a snake and Regina George and then gave this creature sharp weapons or maybe like if you actually found one of those lizard aliens and tried to tell them how humans act? It’s an incredible performance, because Cameron is…humanoid but not quite human. There’s weird little head and eye movements she does, weird facial expressions, that make her seem just the slightest bit off. I have no idea if this was intentional or not, but having now seen her also act in Disney’s Descendants series, I have to think it must have been? She is also hilarious because she’s basically Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way from “My Immortal” except slightly more articulate and with more murder.
  • This season also included the most annoying character, Deke (JJ Ward) who we eventually find out is FitzSimmons’ grandson from the hypothetical future they travel to. When he finally tells Daisy this fact her response is, “That makes so much sense! You and Fitz are both such… special people.” Which, same. Deke is a self-serving ass. He sells Daisy into slavery and then thinks that deciding to help the others makes up for it. He also ends up in the present day through a quirk of science fiction nonsense and… just pretty much sucks all the time. The scene where he gets drunk for the first time would be hilarious if it was literally any other character, but alas. He also develops a crush on Daisy and expresses this by leaving a pile of lemons on her bed, because in the future giving people lemons was apparently a prime seduction technique. Daisy, however, wants none of his lemons and repeatedly makes this clear, which is great. Deke also spends a lot of the back half of the season trying to preserve parts of the timeline so FitzSimmons still procreate and produce his mother and therefore she produces him, because he’s afraid that if something goes wrong he’ll just go poof. And then guess what? HE DOES. A Thing happens and we just literally never see him again, with no explanation. It’s kind of a shame because JJ Ward seems like a cool enough dude, but the character just sucked.
  • And hey, remember how we mentioned that Fitz was literally being The Worst? He was. He awkwardly married Jemma literally just at the prompting of a dying Coulson (turns out Ghost Rider made his Tahiti magic go away, or whatever) and it made me think of nothing more than the terrible Jessica/Hoyt wedding at the end of True Blood, which should explain to you why it is bad. Then his evil Framework self resurfaced and did some unforgivable shit to Daisy, and then there was a lot of narrative bullshit where people were willing to brush past it (ugh), and he kind of tried to do better except he kind of just complained all the time and watched Jemma do things. And then… well. Justice has been served.
  • SPACE

–your fangirl heroines.

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Sundry Sunday :: my urban dictionary: to Isabelle

1 Oct

Def.: Casting an actress who is at least semi-prominent in a television series for a role that is presumably meant to recur and then killing her off in the first episode in which she appears. Etymology re: Isabelle Hartley of Agents of SHIELD.

Usage: To hear tell, the new Star Trek definitely Isabelled the character played by Michelle Yeoh.

–your fangirl heroine.

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Marvel Monday :: Broken Code [an AIDA fanmix]

29 May

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1. Like This (Marian Call)
I’ve brought a limited set of regular expressions in your size, so use these icons for your feelings so that I can more precisely empathize, so engagement’s optimized. The resolution is so high in here, surround sound is so crisp and clear just like in the montage where we met. How it glows! And no one knows if we’ve felt our feelings yet, if we’ve felt our feelings.

2. Just a Book (Bitter Ruin)
Call, call them out from under the decks of wrecks and I’ll bet you all they’ll be loud, louder than thunder but silent in slumber. These words, nobody ever hears. Just a book to be read, waiting on the seabed under the weighty waves for years.

3. I Am Not A Robot (Marina and the Diamonds)
I’m vulnerable, I’m vulnerable, I am not a robot. You’re lovable, so lovable, but you’re just troubled. Guess what? I’m not a robot, a robot. Guess what? I’m not a robot, a robot. Can you teach me how to feel real? Can you turn my power off and let the drum beat drop?

4. Borrowing (Halsey)
Your eyes meet mine, the lights are playing shadows right down to your collar. Tonight I’m borrowing a perfect man, I’m borrowing a broken love. Your love is calling, I’m praying you’ll do anything to stall her. Tonight I’m borrowing a perfect man, I’m borrowing a broken love.

5. Sweet Ophelia (Zella Day)
Singing like it’s a full moon, careless now that he has you. Turns you on to the right songs, promises that you’re hooked on. Oh… Sweet Ophelia, when young blood escapes vows that break go up, up away.

6. Free (Ryn Weaver)
My compass may be broke but you follow where I go and you never really seem to mind it. Sun, stare it in the eye, now I’m blinded by the light that seein’ you with eyes wide open.

7. Diamond Days (Cruel Youth)
Madness is my old friend. We don’t need fancy drinks and penthouse suites to run a riot. The diamond days are done, the diamond days are gone, and I would be a fool to carry on.

8. Green Light (Lorde)
All those rumors, they have big teeth, hope they bite you. Thought you said that you would always be in love but you’re not in love, no more. Did it frighten you how we kissed when we danced on the light up floor? On the light up floor? But I hear sounds in my mind, brand new sounds in my mind, but, honey, I’ll be seein’ you ‘ever I go, but, honey, I’ll be seein’ you down every road, I’m waiting for it, that green light, I want it.

9. Monster (Meg Myers)
You said forever, now you look right through me. You said forever, did your words fall short like you? What have I done? I’m a fucking monster when all I wanted was something beautiful.

10. How Does It Feel? (MS MR)
Pleasure in panic, just seize and hold tight, my body will follow if you hold my mind. How does it feel with my teeth in your heart? Don’t back down again, no one leaves a scar quite like I can. How does it feel when you’ve played your last card? In this together now, come this far won’t let you down.

11. Terrible Things (April Smith and the Great Picture Show)
I know that I’m inflected, but who could have predicted that monster that I’ve become? I keep things carefully covered so no one will discover that I could be the culprit, I’m sorry I can’t help it.

Broken Code at YouTube.

–your fangirl heroine.

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Marvel Monday :: our thoughts on Agents of SHIELD season 4

23 May

Bullet-pointed for… something.

  • So, Daisy’s arc sort of got shoved to the side for most of this season, which. Alright. But she did have some great scenes with Ghost Rider (Gabriel Luna), including the scene where they fight and she begs him to kill her (the spirit refuses, as it only kills those who have done things worthy of punishment). Daisy and Robbie had great chemistry together, and watching them work together in the season finale was a real treat. She also (along with Jemma [Elizabeth Henstridge]) was spared the uploading into the Framework (more on this in a minute), and together they worked to break everyone out. Some jackass decided Grant Ward (Brett Dalton) should come back in the Framework, and though she made it clear she wanted nothing to do with Ward anymore, the one misstep in her character development was when she said something OOC about how she “didn’t fully understand” the real Ward. Frustrating, but my only huge issue with her this season. They’re heading towards making her director of SHIELD, which I really hope is how the show ends.
  • Ultimately the main antagonist of this season was AIDA/Madame Hydra (Mallory Jansen). Yeah, it threw me for a loop when they announced that she’d be taking that role on in the Framework, but ultimately it made sense (more on this in a minute) and damn if Mallory Jansen is not just the most fun to watch. Over the course of the season she goes from being an amiable, if sometimes unnerving, android created by Radcliffe (John Hannah) for the purpose of protecting and defending agents (allegedly), so in effect a bulletproof lab assistant, to a thoroughly deranged character in the Framework, to a gosh darn real girl with all sorts of anger issues and raging hormones for Fitz. Who’s also got, thanks to the Framework and the Darkhold and other sinister things, most of the superpowers we’ve seen now-gone characters on the show have. She also adopts the name “Ophelia,” which I read too much into like a smarty, and turns on her creator for “demeaning” her by treating her like a robot. There kept being interesting little threads of possibility with her, some of which were followed through on and some of which were too damn meta for a television show to touch, but the true joy of this arc is Mallory Jansen’s performance. Part of me misses the bulletproof lab assistant because robot girls are fun, but also, AIDA was the most delightful antagonist we’ve seen thus far and also contributed to the undoing of… well.
  • Leopold James Fitz (Iain de Caestecker) – James, because there weren’t already twenty of those in the MCU – is on a downward trajectory. That’s putting it mildly. The beginning of the season saw Fitz lying to everyone and helping Radcliffe to build and program AIDA, despite a two-minute flash of conscience in the season premiere where he pointed out that after things like, y’know, Ultron, it probably wouldn’t be a great idea for a criminal scientist already in hot water to build a freaking robot. But all it took was a calm, pleasant explanation from AIDA and suddenly he was all aboard the robot train. As the season develops, he does such super-awesome things as guilt Daisy about her running away from SHIELD, expect his girlfriend Jemma to shoulder the burden of all of his emotional problems, save the decapitated head of the first AIDA model despite everyone including Jemma saying to destroy it but he thinks he can do something to help… and then in the Framework, he’s a sadistic torturing Nazi who happens to be fucking the same robot he’s gotten into so much trouble with already, but it’s okay because there she’s real, and using Darkhold tech he makes her a real body, which I don’t think I have to explain is the worst possible idea.
  • The Framework, as designed by Radcliffe and implemented by AIDA (the degree to which the design was modified by AIDA is somewhat unclear), was based on the premise that everyone whose consciousnesses were originally plugged in deserved to live in a nice happy digital computer world where their greatest regret was taken away. Or what Radcliffe perceived as their greatest regret. Some of these were totally reasonable – May (Ming-Na Wen) still regretting Bahrain, Mack (Henry Simmons) regretting that his daughter didn’t live past infancy, Mace (Jason O’Mara) regretting that he lied about being an Inhuman – and some were… something else. Coulson (Clark Gregg) regretted not living a “normal life” (since when was this a thing of his? Since about the episode before the Framework was revealed) and Fitz regretted… not growing up with his father. These daddy issues entered into play this season as well, and I’d previously been under the impression that he was content to have grown up with his mother, especially since according to exposition from Jemma his father was at the very least verbally abusive, but apparently not. And apparently growing up and remaining very close with his father, a class-A douchebag, led to Fitz… being a sadistic torturing Nazi. One who was nicknamed “the Doctor” no less, because that’s totally not sinister in this context. “I’m just like Ward,” he said after exiting the Framework, reflecting on the situation. Yes, yes you are, my ex-buddy, and here is why: not only did his daddy issues then shape the entire Framework into a totalitarian fascist hellscape where Inhumans were hunted and SHIELD, having been successfully taken over by Hydra, was a scrappy band of underground resistance fighters, but he…
    • Tortured (avatars of) Inhumans, several of which he later realized he’d known IRL.
    • Shot Agnes, who was the RL woman Sandwiches had modeled AIDA’s likeness on and whose consciousness and life, after she passed away IRL from a brain tumor, was uploaded to the Framework – ergo, he killed a woman.
    • Tortured Daisy, which didn’t actually harm Daisy’s RL body but if he had killed her it would in fact kill RL her because if your consciousness was plugged into the Framework if you died there you died IRL, so that was a near miss.
    • Ordered an op that ultimately killed Jeffrey Mace.
    • (As mentioned) plotted to build and then did build tech using the Darkhold, the spoopiest book of all time, to create an actual human body in the real world that would also be endowed with superpowers from all the Inhumans he’d tortured to death, so she could in effect take over the world that had done her wrong. (Even now I’m not entirely clear on how much of what ~Ophelia did in the Framework was actually AIDA and how much was a program, but either way – not great.)
    • After Jemma shot (the avatar of) his father in self-defense after trying to get him to cooperate with their goal of rescuing everyone from the Framework, Fitz tracked Jemma down and despite her screaming that IRL they were together and blah blah love blah blah he shot her (avatar) in the leg and very nearly shot her in the head and killed her. Would have likely done had Radcliffe’s avatar not intervened.
    • Oh, and I forgot to mention: while Daisy had been doing the non-terrigenesis’d totalitarian equivalent of what she does now in the Framework, Jemma was literally dead to begin with. When she awoke in the Framework she clawed her way out of a shallow mass grave. In the Framework, she and Fitz had never known each other. Despite the way that a robot version of Fitz tried to consentingly lure Jemma into the Framework with promises of happiness and marriage.
    • And the real kicker of this is: while the other people plugged into the Framework had grand revelations that either it was not a real place (Coulson) or their actions there were bad (May) or some other knowing moment of oh, shit… Fitz did not. Multiple times Fitz was given a chance to go oh, shit and repent. He did not. Also, several other characters had moments of ~knowing each other~ from RL contexts despite not knowing each other (Coulson remembered Daisy, May remembered Coulson, there was an implied flash of deja vu between Mack and Elena [Natalia Cordova-Buckley]) but Fitz looked Jemma in the eye and said that she meant nothing to him.
  • Ask us about our anti-Fitz feminist agendas.
  • In happier news, there were very good moments for the other members of the team! Coulson was a giant nerd in the Framework, which was sort of endearing; Trip (B.J. Britt) was still alive in the Framework and I miss him already; despite being the first to be replaced with a robot and hooked into the Framework, May still kicked some ass and was good; Mack and Elena are actually completely adorable together even though we all thought Mack was probably gay and we can’t even be mad that he too got roped into heterosexuality because they’re actually wonderful together; Mack was adorable and tragic with his daughter Hope (Jordan Rivera) in the Framework, even though they named her Hope when there’s already two different other Hopes in the MCU; Elena and Agent Piper (Briana Venskus) were precious and capable protecting Jemma and Daisy while they were in the Framework; Jemma my beloved was forced to sit through a lot of compulsive heterosexuality but nonetheless she was strong and badass and very good at what she needed to do.
  • But romantic FitzSimmons is dead. It needs to be dead. It needed to be dead before it even began, but it especially needs to be dead now. If any time is expended on any of the women, but especially Jemma, assuaging Fitz’s guilt complex next season, I will scream. He deserves to be guilty because he Did A Bad and while he seems perfectly capable of admitting IRL that he Did A Bad and that he was responsible for AIDA’s less than stellar changes, he never once said “I’m sorry.” He did say “I think I’m a bad person” and that’s pretty accurate. Sorry, ex-buddy.
  • The finale ended with everybody being arrested in a diner because everyone thinks SHIELD are bad guys again. And then it flashed forward an indeterminate amount of time to show Coulson on what appeared to be a spaceship, looking out at the vastness of space before getting up and “getting to work” in what seemed to be some kind of prison. I’ve seen buzz that this is leading up to SWORD, basically the intergalactic version of SHIELD, but nobody’s confirmed that one way or the other. We also have no idea if what Coulson is seeing is actually real or if he’s been put back into some kind of virtual reality or simulation to serve his punishment in. And we don’t know where anyone else is either. (We have awhile to think about it, since the show won’t be back until January 2018. Because ABC and Marvel are still trying to make Inhumans happen. It’s not going to happen.)

–your fangirl heroines.

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Sundry Sunday :: Comicon 2017.

6 Mar

It’s been a convention weekend. I have pictures, but they’re just of me and drift partner ’cause while I compliment the heck out of people I’m getting worse and worse at asking for their pictures. Whatever.

Thursday, in which drift partner pulled out her Red Lantern getup and I… went as Columbia from last fall’s Rocky Horror production on Fox. I couldn’t help myself. Finally a chance to be Columbia without booty shorts! Which are fine for other people, but not for me.

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(I will also brag: I spray-glittered the hat, hand-studded the bustier, and personally patched/drew on the back of the jacket [not seen in this picture] and the boots.)

Friday, we were blessed Princess Leia Organa and her gal pal Evaan Verlaine from the Princess Leia comics, which you should read if you haven’t.

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Saturday, drift partner was the fabulous Jillian Holtzmann and I was big ol’ robot Aida of SHIELD, circa 4.08 when she got shot and had science gloves.

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(Those science gloves, while definitely a first draft [I’d like to make them over, possibly from scratch], were a whole slew of fun modification adventures. And yes, there are tiny LED lights on there.)

And today, as before, Dany and Nym.

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Anyway, it was nice and Vincent D’Onofrio and Evangeline Lilly and Terry Dodson of aforementioned Leia comic and Kate Leth of Patsy Walker AKA Hellcat are very nice. And we are now dead.

–your fangirl heroines.

 

Marvel Monday :: Lie for a Living [a Bobbi Morse fanmix]

23 Jan

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1. Run (Delta Rae)
“I wanna run to feel again, to be no one, to run under the stars of Orion, and all my life I’ve been burning by the dreams I’ve had, now I want to run, I want to run.”

2. Reckless (MS MR)
“Hunt or be hunted on the ground beneath the fuss, corrupt chemistry, that got the best of us. Want and be wanted on the ground beneath the fuss, cool complexity that got the best of us. There’s no one left to deceive, there’s nothing more to discuss.”

3. Runaway (Ryn Weaver)
“They tell me temper, temper, little lady, better bite that tongue, it is not becoming. My blood boils rapids to break the levy and let it keep on running, running. And maybe I’m crazy for claiming my freedom, for loving and leaving, I secretly hear them.”

4. Bad Things (Meiko)
You say that you want all of my love but let’s be honest, we don’t need all that. I like it better with no strings attached. Good girls do bad things sometimes but we get by with it.”

5. Generals (The Mynabirds)
“Calling all my generals, my daughters, my revolutionists, we got strength in numbers and they’re gon’ to pay.”

6. Instigators (Grace Potter)
“Shoulder to shoulder, we blow on the coals in the cold of our souls and we’re ready to fight. You, me, together we’re gonna be the instigators, revolution loves company, we are the revelators.”

7. Proud (Tegan and Sara)
“Freedom’s rough so we take our stand and fight for tomorrow. Finally we got something, something we can bring down the house with.”

8. Haunting (Halsey)
“‘Cause I’ve done some things that I can’t speak and I’ve tried to wash you away but you just won’t leave. So won’t you take a breath and dive in deep ’cause I came here so you’d come for me.”

9. The Outlaw Josey Wales (Zella Day)
“Lived forever, stripes of gold, took the living, reflect your face in every window. There’s nothing, to hold you down, it’s like no one, no one knows where you came from, it’s like no one, no one knows where you came from.”

10. Daughters (Lissie)
“We are the daughters, we are the damned and doomed. Give us your violence, we won’t be silent.”

11. White Flag (Joseph)
“I could surrender but I’d just be pretending, no I’d rather be dead than live a lie, burn the white flag, burn the white flag.”

12. You Can’t Outrun ‘Em (Jenny Lewis)
“And will your mama pull you through? I wouldn’t wish it on my enemy now that I am living proof that history repeats.”

13. Heroes and Songs (Brandi Carlile)
“Some rights and some wrongs, some heroes and songs are much better left unsolved. Between fiction and fact, Illusion and pact where we’ve been into what we’ve become.”

Lie for a Living at YouTube.

–your fangirl heroine.

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Television Tuesday :: 2016 and the No Trope Bingo cards

27 Dec

Ah, our old friends.

Disclaimer: I have watched maybe like… eight different shows this year because I literally can’t be bothered to undertake a lot of things that people tell me I should because I know they’ll fail me eventually and I’ll be sad.

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Bechdel fail: Agent Carter was again 100% on this, of course. (This season was far from perfect, but I’m still going to miss you, my Peggy my darling.) Agents of SHIELD‘s 2015 efforts put them above 90%, including a couple episodes that were just “smack the Bechdel test in the face,” so that’s pretty damn good; Game of Thrones also stepped it up this year, coming in around 70% I believe (the document I was keeping track in, very scientifically, got lost when I switched phones this week, oops). At least in my shows, this year did better at this than other categories.

disregarded logic: I mean, The Librarians always disregards logic. That’s kind of its thing. But again, I did not do too much screaming at my television going “THIS MAKES NO SENSE,” unlike years prior.

underused/invisible POC: Agent Carter… managed a whole one POC character this year, Jason Wilkes (Reggie Austin), so that was still not great but one is at least better than none. Game of Thrones did not know what the hell to do with Missandei (Nathalie Emmanuel) and Grey Worm (Jacob Anderson) this year, which was annoying, nor did it give the Sand Snakes a lot to do although what little they did was still, in my opinion, delicious. Penny Dreadful racebent Dr. Jekyll and Dracula, so that was kind of cool? And then meanwhile Agents of SHIELD ran a glorious parade of POC characters and killed two white guys, while Luke Cage was beautifully black all the time and deal with it if you don’t like it. I feel like statistically this is a decent picture of television at large. A lot of things not really succeeding, a few standing much farther out.

dead family manpain: the Tower of Joy, which only halfway counts. Dead daughters came up sometimes, but usually from women. I’ve managed to cut most of the dead family manpain out of my television life, I hope.

invisible lesbians: no, this year was just full of dead lesbians and Sapphic ladies, in outstanding number but mostly not on my own shows. Game of Thrones instead gave us Yara Gayjoy (let’s be real, probably more like Yara Female-Leaning-But-Pan-joy, but the pun is too good) and let her shine. Penny Dreadful had a Sapphic army. And all the women of SHIELD continue to be outstandingly queer together, though it goes unsaid, but it’s not like it’s been said and it’s not being shown. It’s just implicit and I have a lot of feelings about it (also, Jemma Simmons is in the narrative closet and I will passionately argue this point based on my own real life experience).

vicious female rivalry: the demon possessing Kate (Madison Davenport) and Kisa (Eiza Gonzalez) got pretty scrappy. But considering that the paradigm of this category is Cersei vs. Margaery, it’s not quite the same thing. Cersei (Lena Headey) did in fact get way too vicious on Margaery (Natalie Dormer) and I mourn but also, narratively, at least we finally got Feast for Crows Cersei.

ho-yay: there’s none I’m explicitly recalling, which means if there was any it at least wasn’t overall detrimental.

infectious diseases: thank the gods, no.

dead prostitutes: there was a passel of them on Preacher, but Tulip (Ruth Negga) made her opinions abundantly clear and that was sort of justice for them. On the other hand, Lily (Billie Piper) led the above-mentioned army of prostitutes who murdered men for abusing them, and though poor Justine (Jessica Barden) willfully went to her end, they took revenge and it was beautiful.

dead little girls: see above re: families. Again, nothing egregious, thank the gods.

sexualized violence: eh. There’s a fine fine line, which is always tread by television and film. Nothing egregious, but also could be avoided more.

Madonna/whore: there was a bit of a play with this with Margaery’s religious conversion, but it wasn’t narratively sanctioned so much as acknowledged as a game she was playing.

Oedipal undertones: Cersei’s always a little cesty with her family members, including baby Tommen (Dean Charles Chapman), but with Cersei it kind of just is what it is and you move on.

fridging: aside from the 10001 dead Sapphic women, many of whom I cannot speak to personally, and beloved Barb (Shanon Purser), poor Margaery passed, but I don’t know it was a traditional fridge; Vanessa (Eva Green) met her end but it was of her volition; Emily (Lucy Griffiths) was among the dead of Preacher but, eh, that was a whole town, it could be worse; Candace (Deborah Ayorinde) was more vaulted than fridged; but Lincoln Campbell (Luke Mitchell) died in a literal fire and took the corpse of Grant Ward (Brett Dalton) with him and that was justice.

gratuitous sex: I mean, nobody needed to see Grand Maester Pycelle all postcoitus but at least he died and it was also justice. A lot of sex scenes were awkward but not singularly space-fillers.

inappropriate male attention: as I cast disapproving eyes on Hive. As I cast disapproving eyes on anyone who ever looked at Nancy Wheeler, ever. As I cast disapproving eyes on Uncle Asshat Greyjoy. As I cast disapproving eyes on Dracula. Etc. This will be a problem for all eternity.

pedophilic Stockholm: mm, Sansa (Sophie Turner) basically told Littlefinger (Aidan Gillen) to fuck off in the most ladylike way possible so that was satisfying.

infidelity: see also, the Tower of Joy. Etc.

custody battles: no, thank the gods.

conscious irresponsibility: Jesse (Dominic Cooper) was irresponsible, but he was also possessed, so that kind of makes up for it. Etc.

narrative neglect: see above re: Missandei, Grey Worm, and the Sand Snakes. That would be my largest complaint.

uneven f :: m ratio: technically, this is true basically everywhere. SHIELD‘s main/main supporting cast is fairly even, and Agent Carter‘s wasn’t bad; overall, more ladies, though.

narratively excused sociopathy: plenty of sociopaths but the narrative fully knew how they were sociopaths and said it.

love triangles: eh. Ehhhh.

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window dressing: mm, not in any particularly gratuitous circumsance.

narratively excused intolerance: see also: Preacher is set in a small town in Texas. It’s excused, but also it’s a picture of just that things are bad.

lack of POC: see above.

general male brooding: the only thing Lincoln Campbell did before he died, really.

lack of queer people: much much. I will observe that apparently Supergirl (which I’m still not watching, I admit) has done some cool coming-out stuff so that’s nice to hear.

narratively enforced gender policing: what of it I’ve seen has mostly been called out.

compulsive heteroeroticism: see also, romantic FitzSimmons. Jeepers.

crazy inbred hillbillies: none of those I’ve dealt with this year.

slut shaming: I’m sure there’s been but aside from the Margaery situation I’m blanking.

children as plot devices: Tommen is a plot device but honestly, that’s just how it is. Most of the kids this year were human props.

police brutality: requisite “I hate the Sokovia Accords and everything that comes from them even though a lot of it isn’t even on the TV shows” mention. Also, Luke Cage, but that was calling that out.

love interest syndrome: ah, my poor Jemma (Elizabeth Henstridge). It’ll be nice when this mess is over with. For example.

pseudo-incest: hm. I could have done without Mike (Finn Wolfhard) and Eleven (Millie Bobby Brown). That’s kind of in this category.

vaulting: see above re: Candace, for the biggest example.

gratuitous consequenceless substance abuse: mm, nah, I think there were pretty well consequences.

excused unwanted overtures: and most of these were unexcused, at least.

forgive your abusers: one interesting thing about the unfortunate Hive situation was, at least, Daisy’s (Chloe Bennet) stages of grief regarding her abuse, so that was the opposite of this… but then, this is another reason I’ll drag romantic FitzSimmons, though it’s obviously to a lesser degree. So.

compulsive motherhood: not really?

“don’t do the brave thing”: a fair amount of “I am doing a brave thing but you should not because you don’t deserve to get hurt,” which isn’t the same.

(evil) white guy redemption arc: mm hey, remember how Grant Ward died twice?

narrative double standard: catchall because always, often in critical reactions.

women as plot devices: again. Sort of always.

narratively excused non-con: this year was much better.

past non-con as cheap plot device: also better.

I’m less angry this year, but I watched fewer things. So.

–your fangirl heroine.

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