CHVRCHES GIVE ME CHVRCHES I NEED CHVRCHES IN MY LIFE ALL DAY LONG
“Never Ending Circles.” I think I should explain that CHVRCHES, somewhat because “Science/Visions” but somewhat just because, became my Jemma band, so they just swell me into feeling things a lot. Anyway, I’ve heard this song before because I previewed it for Look How Alive but it didn’t quite go but it’s still wonderful. Look at this first verse: “Throw me no more bones and I will tell you no lies this time; at least I am not so cold. You give me everything I never deserved: this time you know I’ll leave.”
“Leave a Trace.” OH GOOD GRIEF. I’ve been listening to this reading the lyrics and trying to decide which bunch to copypaste because it’s like they did this to me on purpose and it sounds so chipper but I’m in pain but it’s all so great. This is great. This is everything.
“Keep You On My Side.” “We bide our time, stay afloat, keeping the dying light exposed” oh gooooooods I’ve listened to this one three times in a row because I’m just feeling a lot of things and this is so nice and so effective. There’s 80s but there’s this fierce bitty Scottish girl singing so defiantly over top of it and it’s so. “We feel the same without restraint, we feel the same within our veins. We bide our time, stay afloat, keeping the sun off of our bones, and the [something] till I’m swept off of my hands” oh god this is so furiously just. I don’t know that any of these lyrics are necessarily directly Look I’m Alive yet, but this is the spirit of fuck you that I want to give to baby Shireen and poor dear Kara and sweetest darling Tara M. and my poor lovely Nora and all of the others.
“Make Them Gold.” It’s like Rainbow Brite, it’s like eager-angry feminist Rainbow Brite, this is what I want to live like. “We are made of our longest days, we are fallen and not alone, we will take the best parts of ourselves and make them gold. We are mare of our smallest thoughts, we are breathing and letting go, we will take the best parts of ourselves and make them gold” good good good gooooooodness oh this is so beautiful this is everything I’m so I’m so this is the perfect thing.
“Clearest Blue.” Here’s the track the album title is buried in! This is the album my heart needs right now. I’m downloading this as soon as it’s actually released and blasting it in my car until I have it memorized. “Just another time that I go down but you were keeping up, holding to a hope you undermined, never to be reversed. Just another time we’re caught inside every open eye, holding on tightly to the sides, never quite learning why. Whenever I feel it coming on, you can be well aware. If ever I try to push you away, you can just keep me tell me, tell me tell me, you’ll meet me, tell me tell me, you’ll keep me, tell me tell me, you’ll meet me, will you meet me more than halfway” I just
“High Enough to Carry You Over.” Oh, there’s the boy. Hello. “No more clarity, only confusion, every focused thought just an illusion, if I could see you now, if you would listen, every thought would fade into the distance” I don’t even… ship… the… thing… at all… ever… but… FitzSimmons??? Am I hallucinating this because Scottish boy voice or??? It’s also just a lovely set of lyrics.
“Empty Threat.” “I was better off when I was only fine and I was holding on to trying to forget, hoping that you never know, take it back with no regrets” I’m. But Lauren Mayberry is so clear and sweet and self-assured and “hold my ground long enough to see the turning tides are coming from you” and good grief this album is so beautifully AGENCY AND CHOICES
“Down Side of Me.” Slower, thoughtful, beautiful good grief. Plaintive as all hell. I am feeling. “I believe, I believe in telling myself to think forward. I will show I believe and hold you up and know that you’re all I see in my life (?).” This is a trance of emotions and I’m so lulled and stunned and falling backward over myself. This album is a gift. This album is a treasure. This album is going to be in heavy rotation very soon.
“Playing Dead.” Stutter-skip oh god here’s a minor key “there are no silver linings in anything you said, you can keep on denying and i could stay away” this is beautiful. God I love Lauren Mayberry singing the word “down” her accent slides the vowel so interestingly. “No more distractions and no more staying still, I am chasing the skyline much more than you ever will, you could keep to your story and I could stick to mine, we could hold up our hands saying we don’t want it we don’t need it” they’ve done it they’ve killed me they’ve written an album that actually threatens to give Delta Rae’s a run for the top spots on my year-end list. “And if I try to pretend I don’t see it, you can tell me to move and I won’t go, you can tell me to try and I won’t go.”
“Bury Me.” “And I am catching up, and I am seeing red. How do I prove I’m right and raise it overhead? I never promised you anything I couldn’t do. We tried to bury and rise above, bury and rise above you, you. You never promised me you would see it differently, bury and rise above, bury and rise above you, you” oh oh gosh oh good GRIEF this is a song the world needed “reaching for my resistance, nobody sees it at a distance” the world needed this so much Agency Cat is purring so loud.
“Afterglow.” This is also the title of a Vanessa Carlton song off her second album, which I was actually listening to earlier because sometimes I’m in that mood. It’s doing that soft thoughtful thing for the end track and it’s very pretty. “I’ll find my own way back to the silence” this is beautiful. “I’ve given up all I can” OH GOD THANK YOU LAUREN MAYBERRY AND… BOY THANK YOU
–your fangirl heroine.