It’s a good day for Sailor Moon, and we’re going to drink alcohol. Drinking rules:
- when things are SUPER SUPER QUEER
“You mustn’t look at her that way” Usagi says regarding Mako’s starry eyes at Haruka. Oh Usagi you know nothing.
“I figured that a big, boyish girl like me should at least know how to cook.” All 5’6” of her. OH MY GOD USAGI “I thought gosh, she’s really cute!”
It’s like it wanted to make up for the extreme heterosexuality of last week!
Those starry eyes. THAT BLUSH. Haruka bandaging Mako’s wounded hand. Oh my god.
“You’re very brave and you care about your friends,” Haruka says right before turning to colored pencils. SHE WINKED SHE OH MY GOD SHE WINKED
This just in: Makoto Kino is a flaming bisexual. It is known.
Do Michiru and Haruka telepathically communicate? Apparently.
“Say, do you know where Haruka lives?” Mako asks. “Do you mean that Haruka?” Ami asks. FLAMING BISEXUAL MAKOTO KINO HOLY CHRIST
“There goes my excuse to see Haruka,” laments Mako as the cloth flies away. “Excuse?” Ami asks. Ami gets it.
Monster scarf. One of my friends actually had an outline for a movie about killer scarves in, like, high school. They killed members of the fashion industry. They were not as terrifying as this. They were literal actual scarves.
That sounds like it should be a double feature with my friends’ hypothetical movie, The Hats That Ate Everyone.
“Why don’t we tell them everything and fight together?” Neptune asks. “The silence is approaching,” Uranus retorts.
“You’ve got [my feelings for Haruka] all wrong,” Mako says while blushing.
“Is it wrong for girls to go on a drive together?” Haruka asks, convincing Mako to come for a ride in her convertible with her and Michiru “This is Michiru, she’s my classmate” oh my god oh my god.
Holy fuck Haruka and Michiru are going to be my undoing
I am just chugging at this point tbh.
“Did Mako change her orientation?” Minako asks. “That’s not the issue,” Ami insists. Now they’re all having a conversation about queer things. “THAT’S NOT THE ISSUE,” Ami shouts, turning red and slamming her fists on the desk. I know why that’s not the issue, Ami.
It is just SO FUNNY that they’re all like “OH NO GAY” because bisexuality doesn’t exist nope nope nope
That is a convenient modern art installation for them to pose on as they make their entrance, too.
“Put it back quickly,” Uranus says as pertains to the crystal, because she feels for Mako even though she won’t let herself admit it ugh ugh ughhhhhh
Jupiter threatens to kick the butts of Uranus and Neptune. This does not happen.
Then she goes right back to being completely in love with Haruka. Yup. HUGGING HER AND NUZZLING HER TITS OH MY GOD “Haruka is just as wonderful as I thought. One day, I want to become a wonderful woman like her.”
You know what was great about that episode? No Mamoru.
“You’re acting funny, Ami.” Because the Mako-attacked episode and the Ami-attacked episode are back to back, yup.
Bumbling vice principal of the school bothering Ami about being a good person who helps her friends study when she could be studying more herself. Ami is stressing out poor baby.
“My studies and nothing else…” Because THAT always pays off, amirite? Never ends in depression, anxiety, or worse.
Ami angsting to Mamoru about studying. Because the best Mamoru is the Mamoru who’s Ami’s intellectual friend. Tbh. “I’m starting to think that I don’t have a life’s dream.” She’s worried she’s not shining enough and dreaming enough and ugh baaaaaaby darling I’m feeling a lot of things.
Oh no Mamoru doesn’t like shots careful who you say that shit to Mamoru but Ami’s okay she’s a good trustworthy lovely person.
“She must surely possess a pure heart filled with confidence.” Well a pure heart, but not confidence at this moment. Poor love.
Michiru what the fuck is your bathing suit though
“She looks so alive in the water” “She’s beautiful” dear god now they’re racing colored pencils the colored pencils of complete ladyqueer
OH BABY BABY AMI BABY AMI NO
“All she wanted was to be your friend. SHe’s the type who lacks confidence, so she avoided confrontation without even realizing it.” MY FEELINGS ALL OF THEM
OH NO USAGI MADE IT WORSE WITHOUT MEANING TO AMI IS RUNNING OFF TO GO CRY I AM IN SO MUCH PAIN
HARUKA IS HERE
“My partner wants a rematch” UHM
Michiru has a new much sexier swimsuit for the rematch. Ami suspects foul play, the poor paranoid baby darling.
“Is she smiling?” Yes because she is attracted to girls and you are a girl who is attractive
“Why am I trying so hard” because you want to impress the hot girl (and the bit about giving your best is important too)
HARUKA BRINGS MICHIRU A TOWEL MICHIRU SHAKES HER HAIR OUT AND HELPS AMI OUT OF THE POOL HELP I’M SO HAMSTERS
“THAT WAS FUN LET’S DO IT AGAIN” OH MY GOOOOOOOOOD
Wow such hetero
Terrifying pool Daimon! “I will have your pure heart that questions the life you lead” OH NO I AM THIS IS SUDDENLY NOT A GOOD IDEA I DO NOT WANT THIS
“And she’s my dear…..dear friend” oh GOD
“Good thing I had my swim tube on” SAFETY FIRST, KIDS
Hey that rose did something that roses can actually do!
I’m really emotional about this dumb cartoon you guys.
“You must be relieved that girl is okay,” says Uranus to Neptune.
“Doubt is the same as stopping. I won’t run away anymore.” AMI
–your fangirl heroines.