Whimsy Wednesday :: in which Luna is a badass kitty and Naru-chan is mature because she listens to jazz.

9 Jul

I’m really sorry about the consistent drop in quality of my Wednesday posts right now, but the thing is… right now, I really, really need Sailor Moon. Just given everything else that’s on television right now, I need this silly beautiful brightly colored lovey girl-friendly anime a lot.

I love how when they’re walking normal-pace they barely move their knees. And by love I mean “am confused by, somewhat.”

“How dare you use people’s love of cute pets against them!”

This freaking music though. This freaking ridiculous music with her name over and over in it.

“Scent of a Monster: Chanela Will Steal Your Love.”

It is so much weirder that Usagi and Mamoru are a thing in this one for some reason. Probably because 14-year-old Usagi actually sounds like a 14-year-old in this version.

Poor Luna, being handled like a sack of potatoes or whatever.

“That cat’s a friend of yours, right Usagi?” As if it’s totally normal that a girl and a cat might become besties totally apropros of nothing.

OH RIGHT YES looking for the Moon Princess. Because Luna somehow never realized that Usagi was the Moon Princess, despite being SAILOR MOON and looking EXACTLY LIKE the Moon Princess.

“Pet Shop Rope.” Why Rope? I don’t know.

Oh my god Luna trying to learn how to kitten. I swear I don’t remember this episode at all yet.

It’s interesting to me that wide-frame shots don’t involve any movement at all.

Gosh. Umino is kind of a dick.

Awwwww Luna is the sweetest kitty though! Meeeeeowwwww.

I honestly don’t remember this at all! Shingo-kun and his little buddy Mika-chan.

“Pet Shop: Perfume.” I’m so confused.

Weird monster rabbits with funny smells that hypnotize their owners because evil.

Awwwww puppy! Poor sad puppy not getting any attention from the hypnotized children.

And now Usagi is criticizing Luna for not being willing to play at being a pet her meows are the cutest freaking thing.

“Wow, that’s one economical pet!” Mr. Tsukino is very square, gosh.

And nobody thought it was weird that these kids started getting pets that glowed and were a species that nobody had ever heard of before? Really? The people of Tokyo are super-oblivious, apparently.

They’re all arguing about whose Chanela smells better. And everyone is having pet withdrawal. I’m surprised that Haruna-sensei hasn’t gotten a Chanela, too, honestly, since she’s the monster bait. I guess this episode it’s Shingo’s turn to be the bait.

Naru-san’s hands are so tiny.

“Why do you keep popping up wherever I go?” Maybe because he’s your soulmate from another life? That’s a good reason.

Also has it ever occurred to anyone that these places, save the exercise gym, are all only staffed by one single person? That would seem alarming.

As they pass by the same trash can and trash bags.

Awwww kitty! Kitty making friends with little girls. Luna jumping in to save the day and nabbing the problematic Chanela.

She just fell in such a way that made no sense with where the chair was on the floor. Logistics of animation are what.

There are very few pieces of fiction that I will always fight you on, but Sailor Moon is one of them. I’ll argue with someone about how important this show is/was to me and how important it is in general.

“Damn you!” the little-bad hisses as it turns some sort of Mystique/dragon creature hybrid and makes the children into Mystique/zombie hybrids.

“Then shout Moon Tiara Stardust instead!” I genuinely do not remember this either. But apparently this casts a “do not be hypnotized” glitter dust over the victims?

It’s a good thing that the monster’s weak spot was literally glowing.

“How do you know my name?” “I know everything.” As Usagi uses her Sailor Moon identity to blackmail her brother into being nice to the cat. Who is the freaking cutest cat in the whole world.

“Protect the Melody of Love: Usagi Plays Cupid.”

“What? Someone’s using beautiful music for an evil plot?! That’s unforgivable! And trying to take away a grown-up’s right to find love? I bet that Bach, the father of music, would be really mad!” Bach… I’m pretty sure is not the father of music. Like he made some really good music, but… music existed before Bach.

The Negaverse is so confusing to me. It’s just this cavernous expanse full of demonic-looking stalactites or whatever. And floating mist in the air.

“Subliminal ultrasonic waves that siphoned off its energy” yay! Thank you for explaining the thing, Jadeite.

I like that the girls are just lounging around listening to instrumental jazz. “You’re so mature, Naru.” Because jazz is a sign of maturity.

Aw, Naru-chan.

“Rain from the Heart.” What a silly record title.

And this little-bad is heralded by the presence of… bats?

Peripheral romance of side characters who are about to be used as monster-bait.

“You can’t go into an arcade at this hour!” Luna shouts. Why not? Would it ruin her reputation? Or is she just… too busy? Does she have homework?

Aw, poor strange man with social anxiety and paranoia from nearly encountering a monster. Sharing your umbrella with him isn’t weird at all, Usagi.

“A peek into the grown-up world!” Darling Usagi-chan.

Why does she transform into a herd of bats and not just one bat?

Usage totally abuses the disguise pen. “Turn me into a hot musician!” She looks like a really ridiculous punk rock backup dancer. Not appropriate for the classy jazz club

The waiter looks so horrified that she might not want to drink at this classy club. Also, if it’s a fancy bar, they very well might have the equipment to make a soda float tbh (because some drinks have ice cream and some have soda).

And yes, Yusuke, Akiko is just slow on the uptake. She might be into you and just not be the sort of gal to notice affections easily, because not all gals do that. I speak from experience.

Transform into Sailor Moon and fight the bat monster.

Also the way the handwriting on the tape was it looked like “Awaltz for Akiko.”

“Even old guys like you have a right to fall in love!” That’s so oddly encouraging, Usagi.

Luna, you are the most badass little kitty.

All of these little-bads are saying “damn you” tonight.

“Are you all right?” “I just fell on my butt! What do you think?!” There are a lot of ?! in the subtitles this episode.

Good grief Luna. You are a badass kitty. Smashing the evil cassette tape. Making the little-bad fly out into the night.

Like does Sailor Moon’s body just go to another dimension when she transforms where she can swirl around and all this? Or do people nearby just see this girl spinning in circles nonsensically?

But now she’s saying Haydn’s the father of music and Luna’s like “But Bach’s the father of music!” and like… I didn’t know either of them were the father of music? But good for y’all being up on your classical composers?

Somehow she just used a microphone to bounce the little-bad’s sound waves back at her. That’s pretty science, Sailor Moon.

You know, I don’t remember this episode either. Did they just skip episodes in the US dub?

Wow, Yusuke and Akiko got married really quickly.

But darling Naru-chan, you wouldn’t have had a chance with him anyway, you know.

–your fangirl heroine.

taking no shit today thank you

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