Things in Print Thursday :: high school literature in haiku, part one.

5 Mar

I don’t remember
Much of The Scarlet Letter
Except metaphors

Colors, scenery
Even Hester’s child was one.
But that’s all that’s left.

Sad; it’s still the book
From school, about a woman
I remember best

–your fangirl heroine.

love in the eyes

Whimsy Wednesday :: in which aliens understand neither human displays of affection nor middle school plays.

4 Mar

This is such a nice way to cleanse the palate after unfortunate things.

This opening with the Moonlight Knight is hella offensive though. In, y’know, a naive kind of way.

Heh, yes, this is true. But overall, the thing is good.

Is Seijuro the Moonlight Knight? Does Seijuro look a single thing like the Moonlight Knight?

I’ll say it again, the “Mako on Fire” thing is very funny after having just watched Korra, which has a Mako. He’s a dude though, and more irritating.

Why are all of the girls so enchanted by his playing a mediocre flute?

Also, the fact that he turned down free food should have been a clue that something was up. Seriously. I have never known any teenager, especially not a boy, to turn down free food.

The red handprint that Mako left on Ami’s back. The pink hearts part of the stampede cloud of teenage girls.

Also his flute playing would be more interesting if he ever played more than one song.

“The possibility that Seijuro Ginga is the Moonlight Knight is .02 percent,” Ami declares as she runs statistical analysis on the computer. Bless.

Poor Usagi. I, too, have been dependant on other people’s lunches occasionally and it’s no fun.

“Do you ever feel like wearing Arabian clothes and a cape?” This is very subtle, Mako.

Also, the boy who broke Mako’s heart must have been a real catch, to have every positive quality she ever sees in any other dude.

“Getting jealous over your brother is so uncool!”

The “brother and sister” ruse is really not the best one for them to try to perpetrate.

“You’re very close to your sister, aren’t you?” I’m laughing so much

“Damn you, Ail!” Damn you for sitting on a playground with another girl.

Usagi recovered from being so hungry remarkably quickly.

“Love is something to grab for yourself!” No, Ail. That is not the thing. “Just grabbing love… sounds kind of depressing,” Mako murmurs, which I think it more to the point.

Just, y’know. Saying.

Yes, Usagi, you have to transform because Ami is actually good at first aid and whatnot.

“How dare you destroy my precious lunchbox…” A line which would be on no other show ever. And that’s great.

I feel like the Cardians are supposed to look vaguely Tarot-y sometimes but this one just looks like a bad 1980s punk music video.

Did it just…shampoo its hair and then have a fit?

That is indeed what happened.

“I’m having a ball!” OH MY GOD

Looks like Ami’s computing was accurate. See? Moonlight Knight is here and not the dude.

Oh yes! The Supreme Thunder Dragon! Good times.

I should find my plastic Sailor Moon wand and locket and put them in a cheap shadowbox frame or something. That would be cool.

“…I’ll share a passionate kiss with some male cat…” Boy have I got bad news for you, Luna.

“Love is meant to be stolen.” NOPE NOPE NOPE

Once again I must comment on Ami’s pretty blue dress.

Somehow Mamoru’s “strong sense of responsibility” led to him taking over the entire play, down to choosing what the play is.

“My breasts are the biggest so I should be Snow White… want to compare?” Oh, Mako.

Truly an infallible argument!

Ami wanting to be a Snow White who sleeps a lot and only has a few lines, because she has so much studying to do.

Why don’t you have auditions? But that would be too logical, of course.

The fairies in Snow White. Yes. This is a thing.

Also, those do not look like straws. This is where I learned the premise of drawing straws, though.

I like how she just…had “straws” of the appropriate colors hanging out.

Whoops, Ail’s going to ruin the play with his Cardian Bipierrot. A scary clown lady with a cement hat.

What the fuck is this terrifying female Joker shit???

What the fuck is Mamoru’s terrifying sleeveless shirt shit?

Also, Snow White and the prince are uh… not lovers, they are people who kiss once while she is comatose.

Aw, girls. Trying to make the alien feel at home by letting her be Snow White and not destroying their own friendships in the process.

Yes, because fairies are equivalent to singing terrifying furries.

“But then, most actresses are pretty selfish.” HAHAHA

You were already not “playing it straight” by having them be six fairies instead of seven dwarves, but now they’re six furries? That’s awful.

Don’t feel nervous, Rei, nobody will know it’s you inside of that terrifying furry suit.

“I wonder if they changed the script,” Ami frets softly.


I am especially baffled by the fact that Usagi’s brother has not figured out her identity yet.

Yeah, he seems like a relatively smart kid. It’s silly.

Terrifying tentacle umbrella.

“This is the fruit of their sweat and friendship.” Another line that would never belong anywhere else.

“All young girls know who I am.” Why is that, Moonlight Knight?

They brag about their prowess and Mercury brags about her ability to study things and read reference books. God fucking bless, Mercury.

“I’m so furious my red heels have turned to flames!”

“I put off studying to memorize my lines! I could have read three books in that time!”

I mean, not to be mean but I’ve been to middle school plays and I think this audience got a better show for their time.

As someone who has been in middle school plays, I can guarantee it.

–your fangirl heroines.

I understand this better than you do

Television Tuesday :: Deadwood and relationships, part nine.

4 Mar

This is a brief interlude about Jane (Robin Weigert) and Joanie (Kim Dickens) and how they are possibly the most perfect.

The entire genesis of their relationship is so innocuous: Charlie (Dayton Callie) is one of the only ones in camp who knows exactly what happened to all of Joanie’s girls, and although he doesn’t keep it entirely secret he also doesn’t betray her confidence directly.  Instead, he sends Jane, who has never really met Joanie until this moment, to go look in on her.

And it’s this really awkward exchange, full of attempts at social niceties and slightly inappropriate bluntness, but it’s also got a very positive vibe to it.  And then later that night Jane goes to try and protect Joanie, except she doesn’t, and Joanie takes care of herself, but the next day — Jane is sleeping on Joanie’s doorstep, and Joanie invites her in, and soon they’re moving in together and —

Why can’t everything be Jane and Joanie, basically.

–your fangirl heroine.

don't hurt the puppy

Music Monday :: my thoughts on Most of the Boys

2 Mar

I do not know who Sasha Siem is, but it said “chamber orchestra meets pop music,” so I’m up for giving it a try.

“Most of the Boys.”  This… doesn’t sound so much like chamber orchestra as European baroque noise pop, but that’s fun, too.  I like that, generally.  “She knows not to believe in the feeling of attraction, it’s just a chemical reaction working to deceive her into acting like she needs it when really she wants to be free.”  That’s something.  Yep.  Sasha Siem is British-Norwegian.  That sounds about right.

“Kind Man’s Kiss.”  She’s got that sort of like… hummingbird voice that Euro girls have sometimes, and between that and the vaguely plucky weird instrumentals, it’s sort of whimsical and not-quite-happy fun.

“Proof.”  Oh no it’s got violins and percussion like rainstorms, this is great.  Oh, stitches and itches and twitches, how Sondheim.

“So Polite.”  Oh gosh, I really like this!  This is vaguely punk cabaret, too.  I’m into it.  I’m sure I’ll be able to use at least one of these songs in the near future.  “People haven’t asked me and I just stay quiet ’cause we’re all so polite.”  This uh.  I’m feeling things, shit.

“Knots and do-nots.”  “You are the best at untying and retying knots and do-nots” and I’m not sure I am in the place for this right now oh gosh.  This is dark and making me feel things.

“Seamy Side.”  Well, so far she’s writing fairly straight lyrics, but the sentiments are interesting and the instrumentation is just really cool and I really want to plug her into Spotify and see who else comes up?  I’m getting shades of Regina Spektor and Bitter Ruin and St. Vincent and all of this is A+ good business in my opinion.

“Silence.”  Tiny track!

“Tug of War.”  Such orchestra.  Strings make me feel tingly inside, honestly.  Especially when they’re dark and moody like this.  This is probably what Shilo Wallace listens to while she’s studying butterflies or whatever.

“So Go.”  “We know no end to love, we know no end to pain.”  This is 100% Shilo Wallace butterfly music.  I think I’ve just come up with an entirely new genre classification and that makes me happy.  It’s dark but it’s also got that aforementioned hummingbird quality and I’m glad.

“See Through.”  Yep.  This is totally Apocalyptica.  I dig on it so much.  Cellooooooo.  Goooooosh.  I’m collapsing into this, it’s beautiful.

“My Friend.”  Oh, this sounds like some vaguely alternative Pride and Prejudice sort of thing, maybe.  Austen at least.  I’m into it.  All the sweeping orchestra.  “With my hand on your heart” and all, that’s lovely.

“Valentine.”  As usual, my comments are petering out toward the end because I really just want to listen to the layers of sound.  What a nice album this is.

–your fangirl heroine.

smug little techie

Sundry Sunday :: my urban dictionary: manscaping obvious

1 Mar

Def.: As in Agents of SHIELD 1×11, “The Magical Place,” when Skye (Chloe Bennet) asks Jemma (Elizabeth Henstridge) to “remember their safeword” over the phone and Jemma immediately says said safeword, “manscaping?” therefore negating the presumed contextual purpose of the safeword; being as obvious as that.

Usage: Sometimes people ask me questions, and the answers I give are so clearly only half of the truth, usually for reasons of personal protection, that I can’t help but deem the situation rather manscaping obvious.

–your fangirl heroine.

not nefarious at all

Spoiler Alert Saturday :: my thoughts on Kingsman: The Secret Service

28 Feb
  • Gazelle (Sofia Boutella) and Roxy (Sophie Cookson) were kickass, so that was fun.  The former’s springy knives for feet made for some fascinating violence and her vaguely evil expressions were lovely.  The latter hails from my pet region (she’s of Sussex, specifically) in England so she was great to listen to and I appreciated the range of expression she was allowed to show in the script (tough, friendly, unapologetic, nervous, excited, etcetera – all those emotions like a real person!) so, yeah.
  • Look at this movie consistently fridging middle-aged white guys.
  • Harry’s (Colin Firth) comeback to the lady in the conservative hate group church made me want to applaud, honestly.
  • Also, I had people legitimately betting that Merlin (Mark Strong) was going to be a bad guy, because, well, that’s what Mark Strong generally does.  I imagine it was something of a relief for him to get to not be that.
  • It wasn’t a perfect film, but it was fun, generally, and I think that the fact that it was so very British really went a long way for me personally.

–your fangirl heroine.

you don't even know

Fashion Friday :: sweet brilliant girl.

27 Feb

missandei (nathalie emmanuel)

I freaking love Missandei (Nathalie Emmanuel) as I have made no secret of in the past, and I very consciously saved her till the end of this year’s series because I wanted to end on an even more uncompromisingly adoring note than usual.

So yes.  Here is, like, preppy fancied-up Missandei going to some variety of fancy event.

In the Midnight Wower Dress

Like I said, fancy.  There were some blue maxi halters, but I don’t know.  This one just struck me right.  In the Midnight Wower Dress, ModCloth.

Socks - Greet Your Day Socks in Grey

And I just know, in the way that I know these things, that fancy preppy Missandei wears over-the-knee socks.  She just does.  Greet Your Day Socks in Grey, ModCloth.

No Limit on Lovely Heel in Grey

Both preppy and formal, with a touch of vintage class.  No Limit on Lovely Heel in Grey, ModCloth.

So Very Classic Cardigan in Grey

And to finish it, a flowy sweater.  So Very Classic Cardigan in Grey, ModCloth.

–your fangirl heroine.

you're a piece of shit


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