Showtime gave way to the seventh (!) season of Weeds this week. Nancy (Mary-Louise Parker) is out of jail, three years later, and has been abandoned by the FBI but is considered “safe” as her drug kingpin husband Esteban (Demian Bichir) is dead. (We’ll see how safe she ends up being. My bet is not, because that would be boring, and Nancy will never be safe from anything, ever.)
She’s in New York now (hurrah for cityscapes) and staying at a halfway house run by Counselor Ed (Anthony Williams). I haven’t decided yet whether his tendency to make up rhymes is funny or mildly aggravating. I’m hoping the former, but we’ll see about that, too. Her baby Stevie, now three-ish, is in the care of her sister (Jennifer Jason Leigh) and who knows, that’ll probably cause the drama too, since Stevie only knows her as “Aunt Nancy” (and that always causes the drama).
Meanwhile, Andy (Justin Kirk) and Silas (Hunter Parrish, yummier than ever with dark hair) and Shane (Alexander Gould) and Doug (Kevin Nealon) are living their amusing overseas life in Copenhagen. Andy’s a bike tour guide aiming to be involved in the government of a miniature country (?). Silas is a male model. Shane has, inexplicably, grown up into a cougar-hunting… marionettist? I’d have been all right with a bit more of their amusing overseas life, but it looks like they’ll be coming to New York now that they know Nancy’s been released. Of course. And as usual, Shane is the only sensible one (although it’s his less-than-sensible idea to come to New York). But he’s far more logical than the rest. I swear, were it not for his homicidal streak, I’d put that kid on my list of kids I hope my theoretical future children turn out like.
Though apparently, Michelle Trachtenberg will be appearing for two episodes as a rival pot dealer in the Big Apple who hooks up with Silas? Sexy time with Silas is something I’m always okay with. And I’m sure Nancy will get involved in some other relationship that’s terrible for her. She already had some sexy time in the big house, with her Russian cellmate (who left her a key to a suitcase full of… grenades? I’m looking forward to seeing how that plays out).
This provides a good transition to my discussion of True Blood‘s season premiere, allowing us no Game of Thrones withdrawal that is not easily satisfied by other HBO goodness. And, epic. I can already say that this eason is looking to be amazing, but I used the in-house lesbian lovin’ to transition because apparently Tara (Rutina Wesley) is now a cage-fighting lesbian who goes by Tony? Well, men have kinda screwed her over, and cage-fighting lesbian Tony is less of a whiny bitch than Tara. So hopefully, this is a change for the better?
More importantly, though, Sookie’s (Anna Paquin) going to the fairy realm at the end of season three is quickly revealed to have been a crappy plan. The fairy world is not so cool. And if you don’t eat their light fruit, they turn into… goblins?… and bad ensues. Bad that means a fairy who is presumably Claude has to spirit Sookie and her inexplicably young grandfather back to Earth before the goblin-fairies go medieval on their asses. Who knows. (Considering they didn’t get to the fae wars until the ninth book, Dead and Gone, and we only got the on-Earth portion, I’m sort of up in the air about how they’re gonna handle this. Goblin-fairies were pretty epic though, and I … usually like the TV show a little better, anyway, so I’m hopeful.)
Sookie feels like she’s been gone hardly at all, but it’s been more than a year in the real world. Whoops. Her house has been sold and bought by a mysterious real estate company (it turns out this real estate company is Eric [Alexander Skarsgard] and considering he as deep, sexy feelings for Sookie, this is probably going to be all right, especially when witch-amnesia kicks in and makes what I affectionately refer to as Doll Eric happen).
Bill (Stephen Moyer) is now the Vampire King of Louisiana. Well, okay, then. Bill is a bastard-ass prick, so he’s well-suited to the vampire monarchy. A lot of vampire politics are now in play, considering it is, as Nan Flanagan (Jessica Tuck) says, “a post-Russell Edgington world.” (Well, it’s not like they were gonna carry that big bad over, especially since he’s concrete-ensconced, presumably, but Russell was definitely my favorite of the True Blood big bads so far, so I’m hoping Fiona Shaw’s Marnie ends up as epic.) These vampire politics require, among other things, the most epic PSA I have ever seen on television, first epic because of Pam’s (Kristin Bauer van Straten) snark and inability to play nice and then because of Eric’s people-pleasing smarm and amazing smiles of sex.
(Yes, I, like many others, have been seduced by Eric Northman. I am fully Team Eric. I am unashamed of admitting this fact.)
Later we get more Pam snark in her dealings with baby vamp Jessica (Deborah Ann Woll, more adorable than ever) and her urging for Jessica to stop playing housewife for her human boyfriend Hoyt (Jim Parrack) and go out there and vampire-live a little, dammit. Pam exemplifies what is epic about non-guilty vampires. She’s not ashamed of what she is, and while that would make for the bad in the real world and from a Scoobyish standpoint, it makes for much better television. I’m looking forward to more epic Pam time in coming episodes. (That’s one of the reasons I think I’ve enjoyed season three most so far — more Pam. She’s easily my favorite.)
And the whole thing wrapped up with Neko Case and Nick Cave doing a cover of “She’s Not There,” which for those of you who know oldies by lyrics and not title, is the one that’s like
Well no one told me about her
The way she lied
Well no one told me about her
How many people cried
And I’ve always loved this song, more since the Malcolm McLaren “About Her” cover of epic on the Kill Bill Vol. 2 soundtrack, but this version is sexier than ever. And I’m not just saying that because it’s True Blood, or because I adore Neko Case, but hot damn. If the rest of the season is gonna be this lustworthy, count me the hell in.
– your fangirl heroine.