Television Tuesday :: 2012 in television characters (4 who I mourned, 3 ladies I started loving and 2 I always love, and 2 romantic relationships that served as bright spots in otherwise dark times)

Last year, I talked more about specific episodes or about moments or things; this year, when trying to decide what would make my end-of-year list, I realized it really had to just be characters.  Seeing as that’s how I process things.  There are fewer shows discussed, because while I watch a lot of things, I guess, fewer of them affect me in this way.  Oh, and I guess this is spoilery?

So.

4 who I mourned
4. Harry “Opie” Winston (Ryan Hurst, Sons of Anarchy)
Opie was a good guy.  Opie was kind of the (yes, violent, yes, criminal) teddy bear type of the Sons, and watching everything fall away from him systematically had always been hard.  His death was a catalyst for the dark-as-hell path that Jax (Charlie Hunnam) tripped down with even greater manic abandon, so while I mourned him as a character and on behalf of Lyla (Winter Ave Zoli) and his poor kids, I also mourned him as a representation of a bit of Jax’s moral code.

3. Lane Pryce (Jared Harris, Mad Men)
Oh, Lane.  The “in terrible debt oh no” plotline for Lane came on rather suddenly, but then, sometimes these things do.  You would have a hard time spending five episodes hinting at someone’s suicide and having it still feel necessarily shocking.  I also recall idly asking last year for there to be more significant deaths on Mad Men, so I somewhat take the blame for this happening.

2. Owen Sleater (Charlie Cox, Boardwalk Empire)
This one was just upsetting.  It had to happen in a way, because heaven forbid anyone on this show maintain a pleasure-bringing romantic relationship and heaven forbid Margaret (Kelly Macdonald) find happiness.  They couldn’t have run off together, because the show wouldn’t need them if they did that and the show needs Margaret.  But offing Owen how they did, so unceremoniously and suddenly, was heartwrenching.

1. Doreah (Roxanne McKee, Game of Thrones)
…what.  You didn’t see this coming?  I’ve talked at length about this whole messy situation before, so I won’t go into too terribly many of the details, but let me just say: I mourned Doreah as a woman, because she seemed to be good until surprise betrayal time.  I mourned Doreah as a representation of an aspect of Dany’s innocence.  I mourned Doreah because hers and Dany’s was, as I have seen said, really the only female friendship on the show.  I mourned Doreah because of lady-tinted glasses and the potentials that I will miss reading into her facial expressions and the glances she sent her khaleesi’s way.  Of all of these deaths, this one stung the hardest and still stings when I think about it, which is ridiculous, but nonetheless true.

3 ladies I started loving
3. Ygritte (Rose Leslie, Game of Thrones)
I always liked Ygritte, but it probably wasn’t until my second go-round with the season that I started really loving her.  This is, I admit, in part because I think her accent is the absolute most wonderful thing in the world to listen to, but it’s also because I really do enjoy the feisty ones sometimes.  I enjoy her suggestive sense of humor and her unapologetic independence, and I enjoy the awkward looks she puts on Jon Snow’s (Kit Harrington) face.

2. Michonne (Danai Gurira, The Walking Dead)
Michonne is someone that this particular television show really needed.  She is still mysterious to us in many ways, but maybe that’s okay.  I think one of my greatest fears would be that she was just a Badass Sword Woman and nothing more, but even being a mystery, you can see so much in her expressions and reactions.  I don’t trust the judgment of many of the characters on this show, but I’m fairly willing to accept that if Michonne thinks someone is bad news, they likely are.

1. Nora Gainesborough (Lucy Griffiths, True Blood)
SURPRISE.  Except for not.  I think the thousands of words I have written about Nora already should prove that I love her too deeply much.  Furthermore, while I love a lot of characters (as above, both Ygritte and Michonne are ones I love), I count Nora among the few that I am (fictionally) in love with.  Her character arc, her various strengths and weaknesses, her PLAY ALL THE SIDES thing, her Britishness, her face, all of it.  /redundant.  (Also, I think I’ll mention here why Salome [Valentina Cervi] is not on the list of the mourned: while I managed to make myself very sad the other day by idly thinking about Nora/Salome while listening to Missy Higgins while halfway asleep and then imagining a scenario in which Nora mourns, I as an audience member knew that Salome did, for plot reasons, need to die.  Though I honestly didn’t think of Salome as the season’s big bad until I read that very thing somewhere, she was and she needed because of it to be killed.  I am sad when I imagine Nora mourning, but despite the fact that I adored Salome, I don’t mourn her necessarily.)

2 I always love
2. Daenerys Targaryen (Emilia Clarke, Game of Thrones)
I’ve also gotten into this before, somewhat here and somewhat on my tumblr.  But I don’t think there’s any secret about how deeply I am attached to Dany, my queen my khaleesi my darling.  I love her, flaws and all.  I really and truly do.

1. Joan Holloway Harris (Christina Hendricks, MadMen)
This season brought some painful moments for my Joanie (I am still processing the incident with the Jaguar man) and maybe that somehow taints her successes.  I don’t really think so, though.  As the series has progressed, we’ve seen Joan take a more and more active role in her own life, and here there was some action in the form of voluntary passivity to achieve means, which was absolutely tragic, because that’s all she’s been taught to do, but at the end of the day, there she is with glasses chains or spray paint, finally official in her just about running that company.  It has not been and will not be a neat and tidy journey, but no journey is.  And she continues to be fascinating and lovely.

2 romantic relationships that served as bright spots in otherwise dark times
2. Pam de Beaufort and Tara Thornton (Kristin Bauer van Straten and Rutina Wesley, True Blood)
True Blood, as I’m sure I’ve mentioned, is one of the few shows that can genuinely surprise me.  Not just in an “I didn’t quite see that coming” sense but in a “wow, I would never in a million years have guessed that anything resembling that would ever happen” sense.  Pam appearing in Sookie’s kitchen and turning a brains-blown-out Tara into a vampire was one of those things, but I’m, as I’m sure I’ve mentioned, gladder than anything that it did happen.  In 5×08, “Somebody That I Used to Know,” Pam gives Tara a woman who’d been at the bar, a former classmate of Tara’s who was offensive and awful to her, to nom on.  This classmate was Tracy (Anastasia Ganias), previously seen in an earlier episode running her clothing shop: Tracy’s Togs.  Now, in the book series one of Tara’s only functions is to own and run a clothing shop, Tara’s Togs; Sookie sometimes visits before she has to go do vampire business.  In a way, by nomming on Tracy, who is somewhat analogous at least in function to book!Tara, show!Tara is allowed to essentially kill her past, to completely negate anything that came before; that’s the gift Pam has given her.  And their attraction is not instant, nor is it the cause of turning, but instead it grows with time, into, yep, the most beautiful phrase in the world: interracial lesbian vampire couple.

1. Glenn Rhee and Maggie Greene (Steven Yeun and Lauren Cohan, The Walking Dead)
I mentioned this after the season 2 finale, I did, but it needs to be resaid.  One of the only things that I was actually tense about during the fall finale was “are Glenn and Maggie going to be okay?”  As individuals, because Glenn is actually my favorite of all of the characters probably and Maggie is definitely a favorite too, and as a pair, because their adorable little interracial apocalypse love is the sweetest thing.  I’m still kind of mad that the Governor (David Morrissey), who in our circles is called either Governor Douchebag or Governor Bill (re: his emotional and sometimes physical similarities to True Blood’s thus-named douchebag), had to threaten to rape Maggie, both because nobody messes with my Maggie and because did we really need that?, but I’m glad that the confession that threat prompted did not turn into a mess of perceived betrayal and badness.  I’m glad that they’re at least somewhat okay for now and could possibly live to be adorable for another day.

–your fangirl heroine.

Fictional Friday :: 5 more more women I’d love to invent an alternate canon for

5. Julia Sagorsky (Wrenn Schmidt, Boardwalk Empire)
Julia and Richard (Jack Huston) are/were the shining light of a lot of this last season of Boardwalk Empire.  There was darkness and drama all around, but once these two got past the various obstacles in their way (and if you as a viewer could pretend that their happiness didn’t probably spell their eventual doom, as with Margaret and Owen) they were oddly endearing.  But the unfortunate thing about this showis that it takes a really long time for supporting characters’ personalities to really build, so though we know details about Julia’s past and background, we don’t really know her yet.  Which makes me sad.  Ergo: I would like an alt-canon that involves getting to know her better not in the context of Richard, her father, or her dead brother, that involves her and Richard hanging out and being sweet and getting to know each other better without ominous looming doom, and that does not involve “surprise!  Have a small child because he needs to be safe but I have to go see you later!”

4. Kate Cameron (Kelli Garner, Pan Am)
I’ve mentioned this in passing before, right?  “How this show was just a parade of missed opportunities and how I love Kelli Garner for reasons I don’t understand but this was a waste of her” being it, naturally.  In the first few episodes, I was really excited.  Flight attendant who’s a secret government agent person?  Hell yeah.  Sassy redheaded flight attendant who for a while was defined by her relationships with her sisters, friends and coworkers, but that was it?  Hell, yeah.  Then that premise just combusted.  It was too much for me to hope to have a show about women that didn’t have every single one of them involved in romantic upheaval, wasn’t it?  She got increasingly snivelly over the show’s short run, too.  I humbly suggest taking the cool, unattached secret government agent person and letting her have vintage secret agent adventures, but not with a plot getting increasingly tied up in annoying interpersonal knots.  Kind of like a vintage female James Bond without romantic subplots or something.

3, 2.  Bernadette Rostenkowski and Amy Farrah Fowler (Melissa Rauch and Mayim Bialik, The Big Bang Theory)
Normally, I’d put different paragraphs for each even if they were from the same canon, but my problem here applies to both of them, so.  One of my people likes The Big Bang Theory, and is often the quickest to dibs the remote control, so it’s often on in our house.  (Despite the fact that the episodes that repeat are so frequently the same that it would be laughable if it wasn’t mind-numbing.)  At first, I tolerated it pretty well, but the more I watched, the yickier I felt.  There are many problems with broad laugh-track comedies, there are many problems with this show as a whole, but the one I feel most licensed to go on about is the lady problem.  During an episode the other day, I commented that I’d love for there to be a show that was just Bernadette and Amy, both of whom I like the essences of but not the handling of, hanging out being female friends doing science, a show where they were not the punchlines.  “That’s how comedy works,” the above-mentioned person declared.  But… not exactly?  You can have a show where people do things, like actually make jokes or actually behave in a ridiculous fashion, that are punchlines without their character being the punchline.  As geeks and as women, Bernadette and Amy both are victims of this on the show: oh, isn’t it funny, they’re talking about science.  Oh, isn’t it funny, they’re talking about sex.  Oh, isn’t it funny, Amy is literal-minded and Bernadette is kind of cutesy but actually really smart.  Those things aren’t jokes, though.  It’s laughing literally at them just for being who they are.  And as someone who both appreciates literal-mindedness and cute things (like Bernadette’s cardigan collection), as someone who is a girl and who may not be a scientist but likes other people talking about science, I can’t really laugh along with the track.  Also, both characters exist solely in relation to their male counterpart, Amy in relation to Sheldon and Bernadette in relation to Howard, and that’s stupid and limiting.  Hence why I want them to exist in a world that’s better-written so they aren’t just walking jokes, relationship commodities, and targets of male characters’ subtle or not-subtle misogyny where they just hang out and do science and get to be proper friends and not just friends-for-comedy’s-sake.

1. Mary Bennet (Pride and Prejudice)
I’ve definitely talked about this before.  And I do like The Lizzie Bennet Diaries’ Mary.  She was pretty okay.  It just astounds me that nobody has latched onto the blatant opportunity that is before them.  You could write Pride and Prejudice from Mary’s perspective, you could write a completely separate story about Mary.  As I’m thinking about it now, it’s actually kind of the same problem as with Bernadette and Amy.  In most versions of Pride and Prejudice, Mary is really nothing more than a punchline.  An occasionally absurdist one, but nonetheless.  And Mary is my darling.  She deserves a fully realized story without people thinking she’s ridiculous for being serious, single-minded, and antisocial.

–your fangirl heroine.

Superlative Sunday :: my thoughts on the 2012 Emmy Awards

So, the Emmys.

I don’t really know that I have a lot to say about the Emmys this year, honestly.  I watch a lot of television, you guys know that.  A lot of the television shows I watch were nominated for things, even.  (As often, the TV Series – Drama category was an even 50/50 split of shows that I watch and shows that I don’t, and being me, the ones that I watch are ones I am also ridiculously invested in; this is not to say that I begrudge the winner, Homeland, its win, but I do not watch it, and therefore cannot speak to its win.  Mad Men, you win a lot; Boardwalk Empire, Game of Thrones, sigh.  Someday, maybe.)

Literally the only winners that I am actually, consciously aware of, meaning I watch(ed) the programs they appeared on, are Jessica Lange in American Horror Story for Supporting Actress in a Miniseries or Movie (it fascinates me how every awards show classes American Horror Story differently), Jimmy Fallon hosting Saturday Night Live for Guest Actor in a Comedy Series (and the “I want my war horse” sketch is one that my people are still quoting, so props, I suppose), Jeremy Davies on Justified for Guest Actor in a Drama Series (and he was a fantastic sketch country lowlife, so while I would have been okay with many more Justified nominations and wins, okay, sure), Tim Van Patten for Directing for a Drama Series with Boardwalk Empire, and a few of the technical awards.  I suppose the guy who directed the Tonys too, and I can’t complain.  It sort of stunk this year, but mostly because the overall crop of shows wasn’t that great.

Mostly, I came away from the Emmys this year with two thoughts: I should probably watch Homeland some time (and dear lord, Morena Baccarin, you are unfair; Claire Danes, you are also reasonably unfair) and is Modern Family really so funny?  I find it hard to believe that, for example, there weren’t any supporting comedy actors worth nominating besides the cast of Modern Family and one other guy.

Sigh.

–your fangirl heroine.

Television Tuesday :: HBO Disneyland is the working title, but.

So as I said, I’m in Disneyland.  One of my people observed, in the Big Thunder Mountain queue line, that “well, I bet there’s one thing this Western town doesn’t have… the Gem Saloon.”  They do have a dance hall and a saloon, but neither, for obvious reasons, openly boast about having prostitutes inside.  Then the other night (after a dinner that was really just appetizer plates and cocktails) we were sitting down to watch Fantasmic, the ridiculous light/dancing/water/everything show.  I was staring into the crowd, and suddenly it struck me.

Why can’t there be an amusement park themed around decidedly grownup things?  And thus, HBO Disneyland was born.  If it was real, it would have a better title.  You obviously couldn’t call it that, since it would have literally nothing to do with Disney.  But that’s where I’m taking my inspiration.  Observe:

Note that Critter Country and Tomorrowland are unassigned areas; I haven’t seen every Sunday night HBO show, far from it, but of the ones I know well, I can’t think of what could fill those spots.  And for ease, I’m just going off of the map of Disneyland proper for inspiration.  But imagine it.

• A Boardwalk Empire main street.  The same kinds of shops and restaurants and displays, but instead of being run by rosy-cheeked folks in proper vests, there would be gangsters.  Instead of barbershop quartets, there might be fake shootouts and jazz singers.  Oh, and at least one of the restaurants would be a speakeasy.  Instead of character breakfasts at magic morning hours or something, there could be special Prohibition parties at magic evening hours, and only the guests who had certain kinds of tickets would have the password to get in.
• Rome-style adventures.  Taking a chariot ride through the wildernesses of the Roman empire or taking a boat ride to Egypt with a snarky soldier as a tour guide.  A roller coaster where you ride in, uhm, more chariots through to battlefields with other horses and chariots chase you with spears.  Photo ops with centurions, gladiators, and Cleopatra for good measure.  A walkthrough of Lucius Vorenus’ Roman pub/house/everything, complete with cast members dressed as drunken soldiers and bored ladies of the evening.
• A very different kind of New Orleans Square, True Blood style.  Making a haunted house of Sophie-Anne or Russell’s mansion (I’m open to either; maybe once there’s HBO Disney World as well as HBO Disneyland, one can be each).  There would obviously have to be replicas of Fangtasia and Merlotte’s.  I’m also thinking that you could somehow make the Authority into a storytelling dark ride; maybe not a boat one like Pirates, but it would go in that general area.  You could also make it into a shooting game, lasering silver bullets or some such.  Except for the cast members in Merlotte’s, you’d find them in a whole variety of things, but common things would be leather, corsets, the color black, and a complete lack of silver jewelry.
• Deadwood Frontierland, obviously.  Big Thunder Mountain Railroad could basically stay the same, just with more realistic buildings.  Instead of folksy cowboy songs sung at the Golden Horseshoe, you’d have also more realistic performances at the replica Gem Saloon.  Or the replica Bella Union.  There also need to be cast members having gunfights here.  Oh, and there could be a replica settlement on the island, also more realistic.
• Game of Thrones Fantasyland, because guess what?  Lots of fantasies don’t have happy endings.  Definitely a bunch of dark rides, as per the usual: one could tell the story of Robert’s ascending the throne (i.e. the prequel), for example.  Also, instead of the Dumbo ride?  Totally the dragon ride.  The center castle is totally a replica of the one in King’s Landing, and there would be a fake blacksmith in the fake village.  I vote that the carousel gets to belong to my dear Sansa, and while there are replica character people running around all of the areas, this is the one with the most character interaction.  Lots of dudes (but not all of them or even most of them), but you’d probably see Sansa, Daenerys, Cersei, and Arya out the most; line up for a picture with Arya and learn how to fake swordfight into the bargain!  (I saw this today with Merida and bows and arrows.  It was pretty much the cutest.)  The giant snowy mountain would be some sort of Starks in the North roller coaster.  And there definitely needs to be a direwolf ride.  Also, It’s A Small World could be done up really snarky; each room is propaganda for a different king (or queen) and the last room, where they all come together and dance, would actually be a giant bloody battle scene.
• Just go with it having The Sopranos in Toontown.  Who Framed Roger Rabbit? would actually be, like, Who Ratted On The Family To The FBI? and would be way, way more morbid.  You could go walking through the Sopranos’ house and the Bada Bing, with more cast members having gun battles and whatnot; the fake boat would be a goofy family-owned yacht thing.  Meadow’s Go Coaster, with surroundings built of the remains of forgotten dreams.  Etcetera.

And so on.  California Adventures would probably wind up being, like, Whedon Adventures; other parks would have other themes.  It could be a whole morbid adult amusement park industry.

–your fangirl heroine.

Sundry Sunday :: wherein I play a few rounds of performer’s bingo.

Remember this?

The rules are simple: rack up at least five squares looking at one actor’s resume.  This is just a sample board, I may rearrange it in the future to make the squares consecutive for future rounds, I may change the squares, but here are three rounds for starters.

Red: Kelly Macdonald, as previously mentioned.  I’m sure there are other things that could count, but for now, the five.

• Misc. cult classic: Trainspotting as Diane.  I haven’t seen it, but I hear it’s a cult classic.
• (non-Deadwood) HBO series: Boardwalk Empire as Margaret Schroeder.
• Disney (etc.) animated film: Brave as Merida.
• Award winning film: No Country For Old Men as Carla Jean Moss.
• Harry Potter: Deathly Hallows, Part 2 as Helena Ravenclaw.

Yellow: Emma Thompson, who has been in a lot of things and some happened to be consecutive, so go with it even if it’s more than five and she could check off more boxes also.

• Disney (etc.) animated film: Brave as Elinor.
• Award winning film: There are a ton of them. Here.
• Harry Potter: Prisoner of Azkaban onward as Sibyl Trelawney.
• Jane Austen types: Sense and Sensibility, which she wrote as well as played Elinor Dashwood in.
• Comedies that don’t suck: Love Actually as Karen.
• Shakespeare: Much Ado About Nothing as Beatrice.

Green: Ciarán Hinds, who is also in many other things, of course.

• (non-Deadwood) HBO series: Rome, as Julius Caesar.
• Misc. comic book project: apparently he’s to be a form of Satan in Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance.  Which will probably not be good, but still, comic book project.
• Musical film: The Phantom of the Opera as Firmin.
• Award winning film: Again, here.
• Harry Potter: Deathly Hallows, Part 2 as Aberforth Dumbledore.

–your fangirl heroine.

Sundry Sunday :: my urban dictionary: performer’s bingo

Def.: When one actor or actress has racked up at least five of what I consider epic career points.

Usage: Kelly Macdonald has been in a cult classic film that has been judged “the best Scottish film of all time,” i.e. Trainspotting, an Oscar-winning film by the Coen brothers, i.e. No Country For Old Men, an HBO Sunday night drama series for which she has received personal award nominations, i.e. Boardwalk Empire, an installment of Harry Potter, and an animated cartoon in which she voices an awesome princess, i.e. Brave; she has thusly achieved a performer’s bingo.

–your fangirl heroine.

Television Tuesday :: 10 (sometimes ridiculously) minor television ladies I have (sometimes ridiculously) latched onto

What it says on the box.  I get weirdly attached to really minor characters, sometimes for legitimate reasons and sometimes for reasons that are somewhat silly.  Which you all should know by now.

10. Nora Gainesborough (Lucy Griffiths, True Blood)
I mean, technically she’s main credits but she’s only been present for three episodes so far and honestly I still have not figured out why I am so attached to her already.  I mean, there’s the capable ladyvampire thing, there’s the British thing.  I think that’s part of it?  I still haven’t figured out what her game actually is, because for all we know she could still be lying right now (since she’s all good at that and stuff, which I also enjoy in fiction sometimes I think) and maybe she is and maybe she isn’t and I’m pretty sure that won’t change that I just enjoy her presence and want her around more.  And I do not enjoy that every episode and next week’s preview so far has basically been an “oh god is she meeting the true death not yet nooo” situation.

9. Drusilla (Juliet Landau, Buffy the Vampire Slayer)
Yes, she was in more overall episodes of Buffy and Angel than, say, Miracle Laurie was in Dollhouse, but I did the percentages.  Miracle Laurie is not on this list for Mellie/Madeline who I love so much because she was in 57.7% of the episodes in the series.  That’s more than half (barely, but still).  So she was supporting cast.  Juliet Landau was in 11.8% of Buffy episodes and 6% of Angel episodes, or 9.4% of episodes in the overall collection of the Buffy/Angelverse.  SO.  And anyway, yes, I love Dru a lot.  I love Dru because I love the crazy ones and I love the ones who are unabashedly evil and I love the British ones, yes, and I just love her.  And one of my favorite discussions to have is the one with someone who has just fallen in love with Dru because I like to remember when I first discovered how awesome she is.

8. Ruby/Little Red Riding Hood (Meghan Ory, Once Upon a Time)
Granted, she has been present in 77% of the first season’s episodes and has been promoted to main cast for season 2 (YES YAY).  But she’s really only had one episode to actually do anything, and a few moments in others, and mostly she’s just sort of there.  Honestly, I loved her from the start; I think it was the red lipstick that did me in.  Aside from her waitress clothes, she sort of dresses/accessorizes like she came from my everfavorite now-defunct rockabilly/quasi-alternative store.  Also, she’s just very genuine and seems like a good person and I am excited and also terrified to get to know her better (terrified because I don’t want anything strange to happen to her character-wise I guess).

7. Trudy Campbell (Alison Brie, Mad Men)
As I mentioned last week, basically.

6. Aylesh Rohan (Emma Kenney, Boardwalk Empire)
Literally she was in one episode.  Literally I have already discussed every reason I loved her, but oh wow, it was pretty much instant affection for that bookish perceptive little girl who should really be more present.

5. Ros (Esmé Bianco, Game of Thrones)
I do not care.  She was not in the books, and serves mostly for people to have sex with while they talk about important plot points.  I have developed a strange affection for her anyway.  This, I will admit, is largely because I discovered that Esmé Bianco is a burlesque performer and pinup model, and also because of my latent tendency to latch onto what is the obviously-not-musical version of the chorus whore, after my days being such.  I look at Ros and go “oh, yep, that’s who I played in Oklahoma! and Once Upon a Mattress, just in Westeros.”

4. Saffron (Christina Hendricks, Firefly)
I first watched Firefly before I started watching Mad Men, though not by much; even still, “because Christina Hendricks” is a valid reason at play here.  I really do love Saffron for other reasons, too.  A lot of them being the aforementioned “I love when fictional women are really good liars and are unabashedly [somewhat] evil” reasons.

3. Trinity Ashby (Zoe Boyle, Sons of Anarchy)
This is actually just a list of fictional women I have mentioned before, basically.   I seriously have no reason why I love Trinny so hard, but I really do adore her, except for that whole “whoops, almost boned my brother” thing which wasn’t her fault, so.  She’s just all Irish and sweet and I want to know more about her, dammit.  She sparks my curiosity.

2. Mag (Felicia Day, Dollhouse)
(You can all see where this is going, can’t you?  Really?)  “Because Felicia Day” is of course a reason; “Joss’s redheaded lesbians” is also a valid reason, though a belated one as per that was not made known till the second of her two episodes.  And wheelchair!Mag at the end of “Epitaph Two” was also important to me at a point in my life, so there’s that.  I dunno.  I like women who are badass not necessarily because they’re kicking ass but because they’re just sticking it out through tough times and doing what they have to and not giving up.

1. Bennett Halverson (Summer Glau, Dollhouse)
WOW SHOCKER I KNOW.  But seriously, I have discussed before how crazy it is that I am so attached to a character with so little screen time; other than the oft-mentioned “dear holy god it is disturbing to me how much I self-identify sometimes” kinds of ridiculous things, there is the fact that for so little screen time, she actually had a pretty reasonable amount of development.  Backstory, check.  There were fuzzy details, sure, but there were fuzzy details about everyone on this show because of its untimely end.  Also, Bennett is another one of those not-exactly-obvious badasses, in my opinion.  No, trying to kill Echo was not a good idea, and no, the Dollhouse in general and working for it was probably not a good idea.  But damn, I love geniuses who are all geniusy; also despite her various deranged vengeance schemes, she is not someone whogave up.  What happened to her changed her, probably not in a great way, but some people would probably use that kind of thing as a reason to just surrender, and there she is intellectually badassing it up anyway.  I mean.  Headcanon, what?  Irrational, what?  Unashamed, yes.

–your fangirl heroine.

Television Tuesday :: 10 currently/recently-airing television women I want to invite to a dinner party or something

…and then probably hug if they were comfortable with it, because I think that for various reasons, they all sort of need hugs.  If they’re willing.  Nobody should have hugs forced on them, but all of these women bring out my urge to hug someone in their ways.

10. Jess Day (Zooey Deschanel, New Girl)
Or in this case I just shamelessly want to befriend her because I think she is adorable and lovely.  Sure, she actually has a decent support system (which is rare on this list).  But I would just want to have a dinner party with her because she’s fun and give her a hug because I bet she gives good hugs.  I just get that good hugger vibe from her.

9. Beth Greene (Emily Kinney, The Walking Dead)
(I figure Maggie [Lauren Cohan] already has Glenn [Steven Yeun] to hug, so.)  I spent a lot of the season feeling sad for Beth, sad because her life is just so sheltered and effed up and a lot of the people she loves have died and she doesn’t know what to do about it.  It wouldn’t be a pity hug, though.  I mean, none of these are, but I would have to make sure with Beth.  It wouldn’t be a pity hug, it wouldn’t even a “hey, things are going to get better, I promise” hug because I couldn’t promise that.  But it would be something she may need.  Comfort in times of zombie apocalypse hug.

8. Margaret Schroeder Thompson (Kelly Macdonald, Boardwalk Empire)
Well, I think she could do with a party where nobody was trying to kill anybody else or dealing with any such underworld tension.  And I just want to tell her that she is pretty neat and underappreciated and good company, probably.  She is a strong lady, and that is awesome, but I just want to let her relax for a bit.

7. Tara Knowles (Maggie Siff, Sons of Anarchy)
This would be the “oh, darling, I know it all seems messed up, and it may well continue to be that, but hold on” hug.  Since poor craycray Tara doesn’t really have someone to talk to, she’s got the club members and Jax (Charlie Hunnam) but I doubt that really helps.  I wouldn’t make her talk it out, because that’s not good, but I want to just let her sit down, not have to deal with her life for a while, talk about things that make her happy, and know that someone is listening.

6. Winona Hawkins (Natalie Zea, Justified)
And speaking of stressful lives.  All of these women have those, it’s a common theme.  I imagine she could probably stand to have someone to hang out with that isn’t her sister, and I imagine she would make good dinner party conversation, interesting but not too morbid but definitely not dull but polite but not too polite.

5. Pam De Beaufort (Kristin Bauer van Straten)
Again, yeah.

4. Sansa Stark (Sophie Turner, Game of Thrones)
I know that a lot of my people IRL are frustrated by Sansa, and I sort of understand why at first.  But then I remember: she is barely even a teenager.  She does not make good decisions at the start (lying about that whole business with Arya [Maisie Williams] and Joffrey [Jack Gleeson], being temporarily all yay Joffrey period) but seriously, she is barely even a teenager.  She does not by any means deserve the disaster that her life has become, and really, I just want to give her a hug and tell her it’s going to get better (it has to, at least a little) and remind her that she is strong and she can do it.  Something like that.

3. Daenerys Targaryen (Emilia Clarke, Game of Thrones)
Actually, I want to give most of the Game of Thrones women a hug for various reasons.  But Dany is another where I just want to let her relax and enjoy the company of people who have no demands of her and who she doesn’t have to posture for.  I think I’ve mentioned my Dany-could-use-more-good-friends-always theory before, and it still stands.

2. Peggy Olsen (Elisabeth Moss, Mad Men)
Sure, she is happy in her relationship right now, and that’s awesome for her, but there are these moments where I just see her seem so sad, because really, these people at work do not understand her.  She isn’t just doing it to kill time before real life and careers happen, she’s doing it because she loves it and it makes her sad that nobody else loves it either.  I want to invite her to a dinner party and then suggest that she spend howeverlong she wants talking about why she loves her job, because I want to listen to that and I think she would benefit from having a recreationally appreciative audience.

1. Joan Holloway Harris (Christina Hendricks, Mad Men)
Surpriiise surprise.  I have always wished that my Joanie had someone, anyone that she could talk to about serious things, that she didn’t feel like she had to get all brush-off-my-problemsy with.  I have been loving the increase in Joan and Peggy friendtimes this season, I really have, but I still worry that Joan is just lonely and won’t articulate it and poor baby let me love you.  Essentially.

Would all of these women be at the same dinner party?  Well, I… don’t know.  That could potentially be disastrous, but could potentially be useful.  Like some weird television women supper club or some other weird cliche like that.  Smaller gatherings might be better (Beth and Sansa perhaps, Margaret and Winona and Joan, etcetera).  But provided they were willing and, you know, real, I would very much want to lend them the listening ear and chance to chill out that they probably need.

–your fangirl heroine.

Television Tuesday :: odds of functional romance appearing on 6 currently/recently airing television shows

Pretty simple.  But as of tonight, how many relationships are currently actually functional on television?

6. The Walking Dead
The only “relationships” right now are really Rick (Andrew Lincoln) and Lori (Sarah Wayne Callies) and then Glenn (Steven Yeun) and Maggie (Lauren Cohan).  Neither of which is functional entirely.  Rick and Lori are together right now, but Lori did kind of think that Rick was dead and sleep with his best friend a bunch.  Glenn and Maggie were initiated by apocalypse doom.  Sure, she may love him, and he might love her too even if he didn’t say it.  But it’s not really functional yet.  There aren’t actually a lot of relationships on this show, but the ones that are… yeah.

5. Game of Thrones
Nope.  Weirdly enough, Dany (Emilia Clarke) and Drogo (Jason Momoa) were actually fairly functional.  Sure, she was given to him by her creepy brother to finance his power games, but they figured out a thing and were sort of working it?  And then he died.  Catelyn (Michelle Fairley) and Ned (Sean Bean) were functional, but then he died.  Cersei (Lena Headey) and Robert (Mark Addy) weren’t functional, and he died anyway.  Sansa (Sophie Turner) and Joffrey (Jack Gleeson) were never functional either, because they are children and also he’s a d-bag.  And Cersei and Jaime (Nicolaj Coster-Waldau) weren’t functional, because they’re brother and sister.  No chance of happy relationships here, nope.

4. Boardwalk Empire
I don’t care that Margaret (Kelly Macdonald) and Nucky (Steve Buscemi) got married.  They’re not functional.  He’s a gangster, she slept with Owen (Charlie Cox) that time, it’s doomed.  Jimmy (Michael Pitt) and Angela (Aleksa Palladino) weren’t functional, because they didn’t really love each other much anymore and he was a gangster and she was a lesbian and also he boned his mom.  And then they both got shot.  Lucy (Paz de la Huerta) ran out on her baby arrangement with Van Alden (Michael Shannon), who split up with his wife Rose (Enid Graham).  Etcetera.

3. Sons of Anarchy
Basically, on this show you’re either a criminal (Clay [Ron Perlman], Jax [Charlie Hunnam]) or you’re craycray (Gemma [Katey Sagal], Tara [Maggie Siff]).  Might be good for a little while, but it’s tinged with doom all over.  I don’t doubt that Jax and Tara can be forever-for-a-while loves, but they’ll never be functional.

2. True Blood
And on this show, you’re either a vampire, sleeping with a vampire, or damaged by some elaborate scheme involving vampires.  Eric (Alexander Northman) and Sookie (Anna Paquin) were having great sex, but then she decided that was a bad idea, after previously deciding that Bill (Stephen Moyer) was also a bad idea.  No relationship that girl is in can be functional, I’m pretty sure.  Jason (Ryan Kwanten) slept with Jessica (Deborah Ann Woll) after Jess broke up with his best friend Hoyt (Jim Parrack), and also the whole Crystal (Lindsay Pulsipher) mess, and every mess before that.  Lafayette (Nelsan Ellis) and Jesus (Kevin Alejandro) were fairly functional, actually, but then Jesus was murdered.  Tara (Rutina Wesley) had a string of bad relationships, but she actually seemed sort of stable with her girlfriend Naomi (Vedette Lim) until they had that whole “oops, I lied about my identity”/”run for your own good” thing and Tara got shot.  Etcetera.  No chances here, either.

1. Justified
And until tonight’s episode, I’d have said “sometimes, you do re-find love with your pregnant ex-wife!”  As weird as the Raylan (Timothy Olyphant) and Winona (Natalie Zea) history was, they seemed to be working it out, but, uhm.  Possibly just kidding.  Boyd (Walton Goggins) and Ava (Joelle Carter) have a weird kind of criminal hillbilly love, but by virtue of the fact that they’re criminals… nope, not stable either.

I just watch the most functional-romance incompatible television shows.

–your fangirl heroine.

Superlative Sunday :: the 2012 Grammys and how I feel about them

La, la, la.  Adele won all the awards.  Adele deserved all the awards.  I really do like her, even if I wish people would stop misusing her songs in advertisements and television shows.

Best New Artist: to Bon Iver.  I’d… sort of been voting Skrillex in my not-so-secret secret dubstep heart.  Mostly for those apocalypsey reasons.  Bon Iver isn’t exactly my thing, and out of curiosity I just Google image searched: 3 of the top 5 images included flannel shirts.  Somewhat irrelevant, but true.
Best Dance Recording: but the apocalypse did prevail here.
Best Dance/Electronica Album: and here.
Best Rock Performance/Best Rock Song: I don’t even care.  I recognize that sometimes the Foo Fighters are good.  But my babies.  The Decemberists.  (Although I think it’s funny; I read in some review of The King is Dead that someone was saying that “Down By the Water” was one of their most commercial songs in a while.  It’s the one that got nominated for Grammys.  Gooo figure.)
Best Alternative Music Album: unsurprisingly to Bon Iver’s self-titled album.  My heart was with my other babies, Death Cab.  ‘Cause I’m that predictable indie Pacific Northwest girl.
Best Country Duo/Group Performance: “Barton Hollow” by the Civil Wars.  YES.  SUCCESS.  That’s one out of howevermany that I celebrate.
Best Folk Album: Barton Hollow by the Civil Wars.  Two out of howevermany.  I’m so proud of these guys.  (Though I will admit that Fleet Foxes wouldn’t have saddened me too greatly.)
Best Musical Theater Album: The Book of Mormon.  Man, I really need to actually get around to acquiring this album, don’t I?
Best Compilation Soundtrack for Visual Media: Boardwalk Empire, Vol. 1.  Just like last year, I’d have been more than okay with True Blood getting this (so much Neko Case!!).  But I’m into this choice, too.
Best Score Soundtrack for Visual Media: The King’s Speech.  I honestly don’t remember this score at all.  Is Girl With the Dragon Tattoo not going to be eligible until next year?  ‘Cause as much as I love everything about it that gets nominated for things, I just… I want the score to win for something more than anything else.
Best Song Written for Visual Media: “I See the Light” from Tangled.  Well, okay.

S’yeah.  There’s that.

–your fangirl heroine.