Music Monday :: 5 examples of how my musical taste has not entirely changed over the years

Or, 5 artists that I listened to circa 13-14 years of age that I still keep on my iPod.

5, 4. Michelle Branch and Vanessa Carlton
I am lumping these two in together because my keeping them around is… well, of a similar nature. I was the biggest Vanessa Carlton fangirl in the world in junior high (I could play the majority of her first two albums on piano by memory; I still have certain songs floating around up there) and she’s for nostalgia. Michelle Branch was similarly enjoyed, though not as intensely; I keep her around because she is simple and sweet, also nostalgic, sometimes twangy, and, well. “Goodbye to You” for when I feel like crying in my heart.

3. Mirah
Mirah is, as an inordinate number of my fanmixes can allude to, still my girl. A friend gave me three of her albums freshman year and I still know them freakishly intimately well. They’re beautiful and evocative of many feelings and I may be listening to one of them right now.

2. The Beatles
Well, duh.  I’ve been listening to the Beatles since I was a kid, not in the hipster “I did it before it was cool” way but rather in the “I honestly didn’t realize that most of my peers listened to other music because we always played oldies radio in my house” way.  It wasn’t until eighth grade that I started obsessively playing Revolver and Rubber Soul and the White Album on repeat, but that is still something I have been known to do.

1. The White Stripes
I was, as before alluded to, given Elephant as a Christmas gift when I was in eighth grade.  I still do not have every single White Stripes album that ever there was, but I have several of them, mostly the newer ones, and I find new reasons to love them every time I listen.

–your fangirl heroine.

Superlative Sunday :: the 2012 Teen Choice Awards nominations

This is not even worth a full analysis.

Just… read the list here.

Some thoughts:

1. I’d be comfortable with Once Upon a Time or True Blood winning Choice TV Show: Sci-fi/Fantasy.  I don’t necessarily think that True Blood falls into either of those categories, but hey.  Likewise Ginnifer Goodwin and Anna Paquin, I suppose.
2. My heart of hearts wants everything for New Girl.
3. Also it wants everything for The Avengers, obviously.  Even if that is clearly more of an action than a sci-fi/fantasy.
4. How in the hell is Puss In Boots an action movie???
5. For Choice Book, could they literally just select any book they have ever read?

–your fangirl heroine.

Sarcastic Saturday :: dissecting troublesome commercials, part one of howevermany.

After hearing me complain about commercials once, a friend of mine asked, “So would you rather that commercials didn’t have any stereotypes at all?”  Another added, “That’s how they’re funny.”  And I just shrugged.  “I would rather that, yes.  Humor doesn’t have to rely on broad generalizations, and a lot of what passes for it on commercials isn’t funny to me anyway.”

We begin with a State Farm insurance commercial, transcribed below in case you don’t want to watch it.

(The scene opens on a nondescript middle-class white man man in his pajamas.  He is downstairs in his house, the lights turned out around him as he speaks into his telephone.  The words “state of unrest” flash at the bottom of the screen.)

Man: Yeah, I’m married.  Does it matter?  You’d do that for me?  Really?  Yeah, I’d like that.

This is sort of reverse titillation.  It’s intentionally setting up the scene to be something “sexy,” but we know it won’t be sexy at all; it’s also setting up the idea that the typical man might be prone to extramarital relations.  While a lot of fictional men (and women) partake in those, statistics I’m finding show that maybe 22% of married men have cheated (those count even just one event of infidelity).  That isn’t a good statistic, no, but it’s by no means true that every man cheats.

(His wife, also nondescript, middle-class, and white, comes down the stairs and switches the light on.)

Woman: Who are you talking to?

But then his wife appears.  Not only are they, surprise surprise, a white couple (apparently only about 15% of marriages in the U.S. are interracial, but I’ve noticed this trend on commercials where the couples are going to be of the same race pretty much always) but the wife is portrayed right off the bat as being snappy and suspicious.  She speaks in an immediately aggressive voice; she is accusing him immediately.  Though I wouldn’t blame her for being a bit suspicious, this set-up is indicative of one of the trademark commercial advertising stereotypes: the dichotomy of lovable idiot and the shrew.

(The man turns around, looking harmlessly confused, covering the phone with his hand.)

Man: Uh, it’s Jake, from State Farm.  (then back to the phone)  Sounds like a really good deal.

(The woman comes up behind him and reaches for the phone.)

Woman: Jake, from State Farm at three in the morning?

And she is completely right to be suspicious.  I mean, I understand calling State Farm at three in the morning if you’re having an insurance emergency, but the man clearly is not.  He replies like he doesn’t understand why she doesn’t get it, like he doesn’t see why this is weird.

Woman: (into the phone) Who is this?

Man: It’s Jake, from State farm.

Woman: (sarcastically) What are you wearing, “Jake from State Farm”?

(The shot switches to an all-white office portioned into cubicles.  There are accents of red throughout, a la the State Farm logo.  Jake, a doughy and white salesman, is on the phone; behind him is another salesman, partially obscured, who appears to be Asian.)

Jake: Uh… khakis?

Okay, so even though it makes very little sense, the man isn’t lying.  This is just a story about one white guy talking to another white guy about insurance in the middle of the night, heaven forbid that Jake from State Farm be the Asian salesman.

(Back to the couple, and the woman turns to her husband, covering the phone.)

Woman:  She sounds hideous.

Man: Well, she’s a guy, so.

(And then the actual informative bits play in white letters on a red screen.)

Okay.  So she’s grabbed the phone.  She’s spoken to Jake from State Farm.  Her husband seems to be too stupid to lie, given his guileless expression and shrugging.  And she still thinks that Jake is… what?  A phone sex operator?  They never explicitly say.  (Hint around it all you want, but god forbid it actually gets discussed, right?)  So she was right to be suspicious, but by this point, she should really be willing to at least consider the fact that it’s not what she thought.  But because she is a Commercial Advertising Harpy, she will do no such thing!

The idiocy of men, played for laughs.  The temper of women, played for laughs.  And I’m sure there are some men out there who are stupid, yes.  There are some women who get angry easily.  Just watching this one advertisement you might think “oh, but it’s just one advertisement.”  Except for the part where these stereotypes get played over and over, even today.  And it’s doing nobody any good.

–your fangirl heroine.

Fashion Friday :: here comes adolescent-inspired adorable again.

I started out thinking about sweaters and button-ups to do season five Sally (Kiernan Shipka) style.  Then I thought about maybe the adorable silver baby astronaut dress she wore to Don’s award dinner.  But finding a grown-up and still stylistically similar enough version of said astronaut dress proved difficult, so instead, here’s styling around the promotional photo of her.

I looked at several dresses for this.  Blue dresses with ruffles, blue dresses with polka dots.  But none of them seemed to suit the mood well enough, so I settled on this one.  Dance Lessons Dress, ModCloth.

I have no idea what shoes Sally was actually wearing in the promo.  I can pretty much guarantee that they weren’t actually silver Oxford-styled Mary Janes.  But this is interpretive, and I think that Mary Janes are a good way to do grown up little girl without being weird and costumey.  (And I just really like Mary Janes.)  Vintage Reserve Amy Heel, ModCloth.

Similarly, I am fully aware that there is no handbag in the picture.  But this one matches, and it just seems so completelyplaying dress up while trying to assert/discover my own identity.  Which is really the essence of Sally sometimes.  Day After Daisy Bag, ModCloth.

Since you absolutely cannot do little girl as big girl without a hairbow and also I really just love hairbows.  New ‘Do Bows, ModCloth.

And to finish it off, a little locket.  Even though I know Sally’s is just a charm.  Lots to Love Necklace, ModCloth.

–your fangirl heroine.

Things in Print Thursday :: me and Gregory Maguire’s Oz

Freshman year of high school, I got the Wicked cast album for my birthday.  I also got book money, and because this was back in the day, I went to the Borders in my local mall and picked up the book of Wicked that weekend.  So my order of exposure was album, book, actual show.  I liked the music a whole hell of a lot, I still do, but I am sometimes a spectacular cynic and also I just loved the book because it was dark and sort of screwed up, so the way the show’s plot goes still makes me a little cranky sometimes.  Feelsy, but cranky.

I should clarify, too, that I have pretty much always hated The Wizard of Oz.  I owned an old VHS of it when I was a kid, but I’m pretty sure it was a gift, and I really don’t care.  I always sort of despised Dorothy, and I just didn’t give a damn about anyone else, really.  I had a very difficult time connecting to male characters when I was a child, shock though that may be, so if I didn’t like the female characters, I had a hard time caring at all.  Glinda was pouffy and pink, so that was cool when I was six, but she was kind of chipper and flat; now I look back and she is absolutely not a good person at all in the original.  And the Witch was just cackly and flat, because movies back them were very cut and dry This Is The Bad Person, They Will Have No Redeeming Qualities.  So that wasn’t going to happen.

Wicked was somewhat of a revelation for me: the way that Gregory Maguire wrote the Witch, wrote Elphaba, made me sort of adore her.  Not necessarily in the pure, unadulterated, I-am-there-with-you-forever way that I fall for some fictional characters, but definitely in a pretty serious way.  This was a character who was complex, screwed up, intricate, intelligent, screwed up (twice for good measure).  I didn’t hate G(a)linda either.  I sort of pitied Nessarose at first, then I hated her a little, but for valid reasons, which just completely stinks, because I happened to think (and still somewhat do) that Nessarose is a ridiculously beautiful name, but I can’t name things after people I hate.

Some of my friends borrowed it, borrowed the album; I have mentioned before that Wicked was sort of a thing for us in the high school years, yes.  (Some preferred the stage version, some preferred the book.  All of us indulged in both.)  I may or may not have a terrible tiny camcordered tape of a friend and I, me in black, her in pink, waving frilly pens at each other and lip syncing various of the songs.  We were like that.  My mom read the entire book one Thanksgiving weekend while my friends and I decorated the Christmas tree, eyes wide as she turned pages compulsively; these books have always been an “us” thing, too.

I’m glad I didn’t have to wait so very many years for Son of a Witch; anyone who read Wicked when it was first published would have had to, but me being the late bloomer I was, I had it pretty easy.  I didn’t really have a whole lot of feelings feelings about the book, though I found it interesting; I continue to love that Liir was written bisexual, I thought it was an adventure of a read, I still remember lending it to my mother when I was done and watching her sit there reading the ending and getting to the last page and just crying her eyes out.  (My mother can actually cry at fiction, which I envy sometimes.)

I had even fewer actual feelings about A Lion Among Men, though I found it interesting enough too, but then we heard tell of the release of the fourth book in the series, Out of Oz.  Allegedly it’s the last of them, which I understand; Gregory Maguire’s Oz is ridiculously expansive, politically intriguing, but I think it’s wrapped up neatly enough with this book.

This one follows the adventures of Elphaba’s granddaughter, Rain, daughter of Liir and Candle; there are still a few pretty significant questions I have about certain things, some of them involving Glinda, some of them involving Rain herself, but it was a very proper conclusion.  I have never really been one of the shippers of Elphaba/Glinda, but I had a few inklings of it here, and also… things I won’t say for spoilers, but yes, Gregory Maguire and gender, sometimes I do greatly approve.  I love that the Dorothy of Maguire’s Oz just walks around singing and everyone goes “whaaat?”

I can’t actually say too much about the plot of Out of Oz without being a spoilery deathfest.  Even saying the word deathfest is maybe too spoilery, but I really would recommend it.  I think it’s my second-favorite of the series, favorite of the sequels, and it’s fascinating to say the least.  A very good end to a significant chapter of my literary life.

–your fangirl heroine.

Whedon Wednesday :: 6 little details that just made The Avengers that much more

6. Consistent decay.
When I was a kid, one of the questions I always had about Sailor Moon was if their sailor suits got ripped in battle, how did they get fixed?  Was it magic or did they have to sew them up or what?  (Neptune totally stitched Uranus’ for her.  Being the ladylovers they were.)  Live-action stuff is better about that kind of thing, but I still get excited when destruction to supersuits or people is actually lasting.  I love that when the large metal cylinder fell on Black Widow’s (Scarlett Johansson) leg, she managed to get out from under it but she was still running with a tiny bit of a limp until she had that few minutes to sit down before fighting more.  I love that Iron Man’s (Robert Downey Jr.) suit got all scuffed up, then he took it off when he got back to Stark Tower, then he put on another one and it got scuffed up too, in different ways but ways that didn’t go away after a few minutes.  Etcetera.

5. Steve (Chris Evans) is so polite.
I love that he calls people “sir” or “ma’am” even when he’s been introduced to them.  He calls Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson), who I cannot just call “Nick,” sir all over, he ma’ams Natasha.   (And then everyone Captains him right back; aside from the Hulk [Mark Ruffalo], the others don’t really get callsigned to their faces, so I choose to believe it’s manners and fanboying and just general niceness.)  And I adore it.

4. Tony’s pop culture nicknames for everyone.
Hawkeye (Jeremy Renner) is Legolas.  Thor (Chris Hemsworth) is Shakespeare in the Park and also my personal favorite, Point Break.  Loki (Tom Hiddleston) is Reindeer Games.  Tony is the quippy pop cultural voice of the bunch, making all sorts of jokes about things that the others may not even understand, but the nicknames are my personal favorite.

3. Clint has normal nicknames for Natasha.
He calls her “Tasha,” he calls her “Nat.”  It is the bitsiest detail and probably not surprising if I knew my source material, but I just… nicknames.  As evidenced by my use of them for everyone ever, I am a huge fan of affectionate diminutives, particularly when actually canonical.  And I am seriously legitimately obsessed with Clint’s nicknaming proclivity regarding Tasha.  See, I’m doing it too.

2. Natasha has no sense of humor.
She casts the odd smile, this is not to say she’s a humorless person.  She’s just very literal, which is something I assume is a product of her background and also just a natural predilection to think that way.  “I’m bringing the party to you guys,” Tony says; “I really don’t see how that’s a party,” she replies.  But literal though she may be, it’s never once used as a source of humor at her expense.  It’s just a fact of her personality and they go with it and sure, I personally chuckle at it, but that’s because I have my literal moments too and I enjoy them in fiction.

1. The second after-credits scene.
As before mentioned.  And it just gets more perfect the second time; it’s how people, even larger-than-life, superpowered ones, react to a larger-than-life, superpowered situation in a normal fashion.

–your fangirl heroine.

Television Tuesday :: 10 currently/recently-airing television women I want to invite to a dinner party or something

…and then probably hug if they were comfortable with it, because I think that for various reasons, they all sort of need hugs.  If they’re willing.  Nobody should have hugs forced on them, but all of these women bring out my urge to hug someone in their ways.

10. Jess Day (Zooey Deschanel, New Girl)
Or in this case I just shamelessly want to befriend her because I think she is adorable and lovely.  Sure, she actually has a decent support system (which is rare on this list).  But I would just want to have a dinner party with her because she’s fun and give her a hug because I bet she gives good hugs.  I just get that good hugger vibe from her.

9. Beth Greene (Emily Kinney, The Walking Dead)
(I figure Maggie [Lauren Cohan] already has Glenn [Steven Yeun] to hug, so.)  I spent a lot of the season feeling sad for Beth, sad because her life is just so sheltered and effed up and a lot of the people she loves have died and she doesn’t know what to do about it.  It wouldn’t be a pity hug, though.  I mean, none of these are, but I would have to make sure with Beth.  It wouldn’t be a pity hug, it wouldn’t even a “hey, things are going to get better, I promise” hug because I couldn’t promise that.  But it would be something she may need.  Comfort in times of zombie apocalypse hug.

8. Margaret Schroeder Thompson (Kelly Macdonald, Boardwalk Empire)
Well, I think she could do with a party where nobody was trying to kill anybody else or dealing with any such underworld tension.  And I just want to tell her that she is pretty neat and underappreciated and good company, probably.  She is a strong lady, and that is awesome, but I just want to let her relax for a bit.

7. Tara Knowles (Maggie Siff, Sons of Anarchy)
This would be the “oh, darling, I know it all seems messed up, and it may well continue to be that, but hold on” hug.  Since poor craycray Tara doesn’t really have someone to talk to, she’s got the club members and Jax (Charlie Hunnam) but I doubt that really helps.  I wouldn’t make her talk it out, because that’s not good, but I want to just let her sit down, not have to deal with her life for a while, talk about things that make her happy, and know that someone is listening.

6. Winona Hawkins (Natalie Zea, Justified)
And speaking of stressful lives.  All of these women have those, it’s a common theme.  I imagine she could probably stand to have someone to hang out with that isn’t her sister, and I imagine she would make good dinner party conversation, interesting but not too morbid but definitely not dull but polite but not too polite.

5. Pam De Beaufort (Kristin Bauer van Straten)
Again, yeah.

4. Sansa Stark (Sophie Turner, Game of Thrones)
I know that a lot of my people IRL are frustrated by Sansa, and I sort of understand why at first.  But then I remember: she is barely even a teenager.  She does not make good decisions at the start (lying about that whole business with Arya [Maisie Williams] and Joffrey [Jack Gleeson], being temporarily all yay Joffrey period) but seriously, she is barely even a teenager.  She does not by any means deserve the disaster that her life has become, and really, I just want to give her a hug and tell her it’s going to get better (it has to, at least a little) and remind her that she is strong and she can do it.  Something like that.

3. Daenerys Targaryen (Emilia Clarke, Game of Thrones)
Actually, I want to give most of the Game of Thrones women a hug for various reasons.  But Dany is another where I just want to let her relax and enjoy the company of people who have no demands of her and who she doesn’t have to posture for.  I think I’ve mentioned my Dany-could-use-more-good-friends-always theory before, and it still stands.

2. Peggy Olsen (Elisabeth Moss, Mad Men)
Sure, she is happy in her relationship right now, and that’s awesome for her, but there are these moments where I just see her seem so sad, because really, these people at work do not understand her.  She isn’t just doing it to kill time before real life and careers happen, she’s doing it because she loves it and it makes her sad that nobody else loves it either.  I want to invite her to a dinner party and then suggest that she spend howeverlong she wants talking about why she loves her job, because I want to listen to that and I think she would benefit from having a recreationally appreciative audience.

1. Joan Holloway Harris (Christina Hendricks, Mad Men)
Surpriiise surprise.  I have always wished that my Joanie had someone, anyone that she could talk to about serious things, that she didn’t feel like she had to get all brush-off-my-problemsy with.  I have been loving the increase in Joan and Peggy friendtimes this season, I really have, but I still worry that Joan is just lonely and won’t articulate it and poor baby let me love you.  Essentially.

Would all of these women be at the same dinner party?  Well, I… don’t know.  That could potentially be disastrous, but could potentially be useful.  Like some weird television women supper club or some other weird cliche like that.  Smaller gatherings might be better (Beth and Sansa perhaps, Margaret and Winona and Joan, etcetera).  But provided they were willing and, you know, real, I would very much want to lend them the listening ear and chance to chill out that they probably need.

–your fangirl heroine.

Music Monday :: 6 instrumental television and film soundtracks that make my life a little more epic

Not soundtracks like with music you’ve actually heard by people singing on the radio or something.  I’m talking instrumentals here.  In no order of course.

6. Mad Men, After Hours: Music from the Original Series, David Carbonara
The album was released in 2010, so it’s got bits from most of the series; this one is a little different from the rest because it’s not epic like bam!  I’m gonna kick some ass epic, it’s more I am so classy watch me go epic.  Which everyone needs in their life sometimes.  There are lots of Mad Men-related albums, but this is the only one I have, and I like to put it on sometimes when I’m getting ready to go out, when I’ve already been kicking around in my slip and my bustier thingy and my satin bathrobe for hours and fussing with my hair and painting my lipstick on with a brush.  It’s that kind of album, she said predictably.

5. Planet Terror soundtrack, Robert Rodriguez and others
This is something I love about Robert Rodriguez.  He makes these pretty awesome films and then he just so happens to write pretty awesome music to go with sometimes.  And I am still a little obsessed with the “Grindhouse Main Title,” honestly.  It is just a crazy-sexy-good track and it makes me feel really, really cool when I’m at the gym or something.

4. Game of Thrones (Music From The HBO Series), Ramin Djawadi
Honestly, the opening credits music gave me tinglies from the beginning.  I love this soundtrack for being one that needs to evoke so many different influences and moods and characters yet seeming completely cohesive anyway.  There are certain things that linger, certain themes or drum patterns or instrumental decoration, but the tracks are well-suited to their purposes every time.

3. The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo soundtrack, Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross
Oh wait, I’ve mentioned this before?  I’ll just go ahead and say it again.  This is industrial-ish epic at its best and sometimes when I’m feeling particularly antisocial or the weather is gray and gloomy, I’ll turn it on my headphones while I’m using my computer in the student union and try to feel as epic as Lisbeth Salander.

2. Firefly (Original Television Soundtrack), Greg Edmonson
Basically, turning this album on reduces me to a pile of emotional goo, because it is evocative and beautiful.  It has the twang that I so desperately often love, it has its slow and sad (and oh lord “The Funeral,” I melt every single time) and its folksy and rousing (and oh lord “River’s Dance,” I grin every single time) and it’s essentially just a perfect soundtrack because there is a track for everything.

1. Serenity soundtrack, David Newman
This doesn’t have too terribly much of the twangy spirit of the show’s soundtrack, no.  It’s a little more like any old action soundtrack, yes.  Do I mind particularly?  No.  The last track alone is enough to make me so happy I could cry if I did that.

–your fangirl heroine.

Sundry Sunday :: 10 of my people-related “things”

I’m not even sure that’s a correct way to phrase this.  I was going to consider calling this list “10 narrative kinks,” but it’s not really that; a lot of my narrative kinks are more character types and less behavior patterns/physical traits, which is what this list is.  Then I though about being sketchy and trying something that phrased around one of my tumblr tags, #why does fetish have to be a creepy word?  But that makes it sketchy.  And I swear it’s not.  A lot of the people who are responsible for these listed items are people that I’m attracted to/fictionally crush on, yes, but it’s not just about that.  It’s just things I… really, really like.  Some for reasons, some not for reasons, some because of fictional reasons, some just because.

10. (generally re: women) a certain particular cute nose.
This is mostly the fault of a bunch of my favorite actresses, and it didn’t even happen consciously; one day, I just realized that a lot of them have similar adorable little bitty snub noses.  I’m pretty sure the nose I’m talking about is the one that Amy of Little Women actually hated about herself, but I think it’s cute.  I mean, any nose can be cute, but… yeah.

Unsurprisingly, Summer Glau demonstrates this, as does the lovely Alison Pill.

9. The blue eyes/brown or red hair combination.
As if my previous endless lists of beautiful blue eyes were not any indication.  Goes for girls and guys both.  A la Deborah Ann Woll, Christina Hendricks, Zooey Deschanel, Sean Maher.  

8. Robot arms.
As previously discussed.  I love robot arms.

7. Vests.
This one can go for both, but usually winds up being men, because men wear more vests.  And it’s completely the fault of two fictional men, predictably my two fictional men, Simon (Sean Maher) and Topher (Fran Kranz).

But because of them, I notice it other places, and go jump-yay-want.

6. Corsetry
Fairly self-explanatory, and not really the fault of any one thing; I think I first started noticing corsets in junior high, thanks to Rocky Horror, but my corset “thing” didn’t really kick off till late high school, maybe even early college.  The first corset I owned was my Repo one, the black one we stitched an ungodly amount of feathers to, and once I actually had one, well.  I understand that corseting back in the day was sometime done unhealthily and represented body-related gǒ se, but if done healthily and properly and for your own enjoyment, I think corseting is kind of fun.  I don’t tightlace.  That’s too intense for me.  But I kind of like the way that corsets feel, and I love how they look, on me and just in general, because that’s really the only person I’m trying to impress.

5. Glasses (particularly when people take them on and off with one hand)
Putting glasses on someone’s face doesn’t make me go OKAY WANT, but if I was going OKAY WANT anyway and then glasses happened because they needed to (IRL or in fiction) I like it.  And the removing thing… well, that’s the fault of two fictional characters, again; this time Giles (Anthony Stewart Head) and Bennett (Summer Glau).

…yeah.

4. Technobabbling of any sort.
Even if I don’t really understand, I enjoy listening to people, real or fictional, go on at great length about technical things that they are passionate about.  Any verbal tl;dr, really.  Kaylee’s engine talk, Giles’ academia talk, Topher’s brain talk.  I just like passionate people being passionate about things.

3. Actually any neuroscience talk.
The minute I see/hear the word “brain” or anything preceded by “neuro-,” my eyes/ears perk up and I’m all at attention.  Knowing a lot about anything is sort of awesome, as above, but considering that I actually recreationally jump all over learning neuroscience stuff myself, I love listening to other people who know about it talk.

2. Cellos.
This has nothing to do with any cellist I have ever listened to or known.  This is just about cellos themselves.  And honestly, I find the sound of cellos to be sexy.  I have no idea why, but I have for quite a long time.

1. Verbal declarations of intent.
This one is largely fictional, yes.  But I really enjoy when fictional characters put on their assertive (not aggressive, there’s a difference) voice and state what they intend to do.

Things like Mal’s (Nathan Fillion) “I aim to misbehave” speech, like every time Dany (Emilia Clarke) gives variations of the “I am Daenerys Stormborn of House Targaryen, and I will take what is mine with fire and blood” speech.  I just get tingles of happiness.

–your fangirl heroine.

Spoiler Alert Saturday :: my thoughts on Dark Shadows

This was a ridiculous film, there is no question about it.  A lot of people thought it looked bad ridiculous, and I could see how you might think that.  If this sort of thing isn’t to your taste generally, this wouldn’t be to your taste now.  But see, I’m the kind of girl who enjoys reading all of the books that are even in the vague genre that Seth Grahame-Smith created.  I enjoy ridiculous monster mashups.  I enjoy kitschy insanity, and while I don’t always enjoy Johnny Depp, I can be convinced to enjoy him sometimes.

I don’t know the original Dark Shadows.  I’m familiar with the concept of it, but I’ve never watched any of it.  No, this was just straight-up Seth Grahame-Smith madness with a good dose of Tim Burton: in short, exactly what I could have expected of it.  I didn’t cringe when I saw the trailer like some people did, though.  I just giggled.

Highlights:

• Depp wasn’t frustrating me like some of his characters have happened to do in recent years.  Barnabas Collins was really just an earnest, out-of-his-time vampire fellow.  He was ridiculous, yes, but he wasn’t aggravatingly ridiculous.  It was well-placed.
• Michelle Pfeiffer was an effective matriarch.  I really can see her and Chloe Moretz being related somehow, that casting made sense.
• Main highlight of the movie was predictably Chloe Moretz herself.  She is my favorite always.  Even when she is playing a moody and very 1970s and very too-cool-for-school teenager type.  Carolyn was the character in this movie who was so wtf about the scenario that the audience could relate.  She could be confused about Barnabas in a way that nobody else was and through that she was a lens for everyone else being confused.  Characters like this exist a lot in fiction nowadays, but I’m okay with it.  And also, I just loved her quasi-surprise.  Maybe it wasn’t a surprise if you knew the source material, but I think it was awesome.
• Jackie Earle Haley was creepy.
• The little boy, Gulliver McGrath, was eerie.
• The dad/uncle, Jonny Lee Miller, was a d-bag.
• Bella Heathcoate was just a giant-eyed porcelain doll.  I’ve never heard of her before, though apparently she is IRL from Australia and was on Neighbours; I’ve never watched that, but I know of it from stalking other Australian performers’ resumes.  She was very effective though, and I enjoyed her giant eyes.
• Uhm, Eva Green was evil and craycray.  In a campy and enjoyable way.  It’s sort of unfair that she can manage to be beautiful even with her skin CGI’d into cracking porcelain.  Also, I have never realized how good she is at crazy eyes.  She worked those.

–your fangirl heroine.